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Happy Birthday to me
Today is my birthday but it doesn't feel like it. It's not like I imagined it would be. It's like every other day, except that it's my birthday.
Toaday is another day of reminisce. A year ago,that was when everything changed. There used to be more friends, more liveliness, more.. purpose.
I remember the day we went on a school outing. We went to Mc'Carthy .I was only ten and I couldn't swim. We had chocolates,wafers,juice,chicken.. there was so much food. That memory is one i wouldn't wanna forget.
I recall the day I was elected a school prefect.We were called out on the assembly ground and had our badges pinned to our shirts.
I was really happy.It made me feel trustworthy.It gave me this sense of responsibility.
Then graduation..ah, there's no way I'll ever forget that day.We closed one chapter of our lives and opened another.We lost some contacts but somehow managed to keep in touch with few.
I remember what it felt like to like a boy, having no idea of what you're feeling....the day he asked me for a hug and I literally froze. I also remember the day he held my hands and filled the space between his fingers with mine.I gripped his fingers really tight and I didn't wanna ever let go.
Yes.. and those times he would look me in the eyes and I look away instantly.I could've sworn my cheeks were turning tomato red.
Finally,I remember that day.The very last time I saw his face.It was the day we moved away. I hugged him, and I walked away. I didn't look back. I cried when I was alone,I didn't let anyone see me cry.
I felt the pain would never go away.
I recall that since then,it hadn't been the same.My phone rang minimally. My texts were left hanging. Maybe,I was the only one missing him. Maybe he didn't miss me too. A month then two,and he wouldn't call. Then I realized that perhaps, there weren't any feelings, perhaps I was the naive girl of sixteen.
I recall the pain I felt.I denied that I had any feelings and I would push the memories of him back,so I wouldn't feel the pain. Then it came back at once,and I couldn't push the pain away.I would listen to our call recordings and cry.I missed him and there was nothing I could do about it.
I recall that with time,I healed.I stopped crying.I realised that it was just a phase.I attained maturity and little things like that couldn't bother me anymore.I embraced change and set priorities in place.
Today is my birthday and I got goals to achieve. It's a new year of my life and I'm embracing positivity.
Happy birthday to me!
Toaday is another day of reminisce. A year ago,that was when everything changed. There used to be more friends, more liveliness, more.. purpose.
I remember the day we went on a school outing. We went to Mc'Carthy .I was only ten and I couldn't swim. We had chocolates,wafers,juice,chicken.. there was so much food. That memory is one i wouldn't wanna forget.
I recall the day I was elected a school prefect.We were called out on the assembly ground and had our badges pinned to our shirts.
I was really happy.It made me feel trustworthy.It gave me this sense of responsibility.
Then graduation..ah, there's no way I'll ever forget that day.We closed one chapter of our lives and opened another.We lost some contacts but somehow managed to keep in touch with few.
I remember what it felt like to like a boy, having no idea of what you're feeling....the day he asked me for a hug and I literally froze. I also remember the day he held my hands and filled the space between his fingers with mine.I gripped his fingers really tight and I didn't wanna ever let go.
Yes.. and those times he would look me in the eyes and I look away instantly.I could've sworn my cheeks were turning tomato red.
Finally,I remember that day.The very last time I saw his face.It was the day we moved away. I hugged him, and I walked away. I didn't look back. I cried when I was alone,I didn't let anyone see me cry.
I felt the pain would never go away.
I recall that since then,it hadn't been the same.My phone rang minimally. My texts were left hanging. Maybe,I was the only one missing him. Maybe he didn't miss me too. A month then two,and he wouldn't call. Then I realized that perhaps, there weren't any feelings, perhaps I was the naive girl of sixteen.
I recall the pain I felt.I denied that I had any feelings and I would push the memories of him back,so I wouldn't feel the pain. Then it came back at once,and I couldn't push the pain away.I would listen to our call recordings and cry.I missed him and there was nothing I could do about it.
I recall that with time,I healed.I stopped crying.I realised that it was just a phase.I attained maturity and little things like that couldn't bother me anymore.I embraced change and set priorities in place.
Today is my birthday and I got goals to achieve. It's a new year of my life and I'm embracing positivity.
Happy birthday to me!
