12 views
Memories: When I Experienced Time Travel
One of my favorite experiences with my dog named Cautious is also one that I want to always remember and carry with me. Its the day I ( as I like to refer to it) time traveled to see him. ( I know, I know it sounds very fictitious but hear me out before you judge. ) Okay so on this particular day I was sitting on my bed pondering one of my favorite quotes( as I often did ) It always seemed like some sort of key. "Your future self is watching you through memory right now"
The image in the background of the quote was a humanoid figure sitting Indian style looking at a much smaller version of itself in the palm of its hand; which is also sitting Indian style looking at an even smaller version of itself and so on and so on. So, as I contemplated that concept, I thought to myself..." if hypothetically a bigger version of myself( i.e. future me) was watching this very moment right now through memory... what memory would I choose for this moment to mean to me in the future to make it worth remembering? What would make it special enough to look back on?
And as I was searching for the theoretical answer I looked down and seen Cautious (my blue pittbull) sitting there looking back at me...and that's when it happened! As soon as my eyes met my dogs eyes, I got my answer. Because the future version of myself that was watching that moment through memory; was the future version of myself that had outlived my dear dog. And she(future me) fell to her knees beside him and wept so hard she could barely say what she needed to say to him. She only had the ability to weep and SOB out of pure joy and thankfulness for getting to go back in time to touch him and hug him and tell him all the things she wanted to tell him...that she wanted him to know but couldn't because their time together had ran out. She was choked up by the extreme heartache of heartbreak for losing him and the pure joy simultaniously; and by understanding how blessed she was for this very precious gift of one last time with him. And she took advantage fully in every way, to take him back with her in the sense of (example:) as she hugged him and cried she made sure to breathe in his scent so deeply since she now knows what life would be without it. The moment was so overwhelmingly emotional, she was too choked up in her throat to get out even a single word spoke out loud except for the sobs and maybe a faint whimper escaped her body but that's all she was able to muster. Still, the moment was beautiful and exactly how it should be... The whole "time travel" experience lasted a brief 5 to 10 minutes tops befor she said her last and final goodbye to him and then, instantly I was back to being current me again. The power of it changed both versions not just the future me because even current me new what a precious gift she was given. To have that to carry with her and to get to say goodbye the way they both deserved it to be and since current me knew how much I loved him , I knew exactly what that moment meant to her. I know when I refer to it as time travel this isn't what anyone else would accept as that but what I experienced could never be put into words. How truly powerful and overwhelming the whole thing was. So without knowledge of that there's no reason to understand what I mean and why I call it what it was. I totally time traveled in some small way without a doubt. I haven't really spoke out loud to anyone about it because I know no one will ever get it but me and that's as it should be and so now I'm currently thankful of a memory of a memory and so on . Mind blowing s*** for real!
© Warrior/Goddess
The image in the background of the quote was a humanoid figure sitting Indian style looking at a much smaller version of itself in the palm of its hand; which is also sitting Indian style looking at an even smaller version of itself and so on and so on. So, as I contemplated that concept, I thought to myself..." if hypothetically a bigger version of myself( i.e. future me) was watching this very moment right now through memory... what memory would I choose for this moment to mean to me in the future to make it worth remembering? What would make it special enough to look back on?
And as I was searching for the theoretical answer I looked down and seen Cautious (my blue pittbull) sitting there looking back at me...and that's when it happened! As soon as my eyes met my dogs eyes, I got my answer. Because the future version of myself that was watching that moment through memory; was the future version of myself that had outlived my dear dog. And she(future me) fell to her knees beside him and wept so hard she could barely say what she needed to say to him. She only had the ability to weep and SOB out of pure joy and thankfulness for getting to go back in time to touch him and hug him and tell him all the things she wanted to tell him...that she wanted him to know but couldn't because their time together had ran out. She was choked up by the extreme heartache of heartbreak for losing him and the pure joy simultaniously; and by understanding how blessed she was for this very precious gift of one last time with him. And she took advantage fully in every way, to take him back with her in the sense of (example:) as she hugged him and cried she made sure to breathe in his scent so deeply since she now knows what life would be without it. The moment was so overwhelmingly emotional, she was too choked up in her throat to get out even a single word spoke out loud except for the sobs and maybe a faint whimper escaped her body but that's all she was able to muster. Still, the moment was beautiful and exactly how it should be... The whole "time travel" experience lasted a brief 5 to 10 minutes tops befor she said her last and final goodbye to him and then, instantly I was back to being current me again. The power of it changed both versions not just the future me because even current me new what a precious gift she was given. To have that to carry with her and to get to say goodbye the way they both deserved it to be and since current me knew how much I loved him , I knew exactly what that moment meant to her. I know when I refer to it as time travel this isn't what anyone else would accept as that but what I experienced could never be put into words. How truly powerful and overwhelming the whole thing was. So without knowledge of that there's no reason to understand what I mean and why I call it what it was. I totally time traveled in some small way without a doubt. I haven't really spoke out loud to anyone about it because I know no one will ever get it but me and that's as it should be and so now I'm currently thankful of a memory of a memory and so on . Mind blowing s*** for real!
© Warrior/Goddess
