So after a long gap in Winter greys, I feel like.
I feel like, I live my life a monotonous, without any flow.
that's why I feel like winter...

Once I used to love winter, yes the morning dawn with winter fogs, aren't they cool?
and then they are cold and heartless, made me sick for several months.
I lacked immunity and courage in heart, body and life.

Life wasn't easy, but SIMPLE!

What I can be? more than be grateful to God.
Thanks to God, my friend.

You know what, I'm an Extrovert.
I always loved to be around friends and I've been.
Today me and my sister had a serious conversation with silly words.

she said "You've changed"
"What insense of?? Everyone grows, little one" I mocked her
"You grow differently, in childhood days, you used to speak a lot, play with us a lot, now you see all time paper and college, no talks, come home, have tea and sleep, life was good when you don't grow, I wish you don't grow"

I nearly had a heart break.
a girl broke my heart 😂

and then the light, had to come somewhere.
within the crack the light had to enter.

I looked at myself in the mirror.

I was kinda attractive, but I'm not being a human in first sense.
I've not been in home when mom Or dad calls my name, I've not been there for my sisters group project work, I took a course to go aboard....

I was not there for my family, when they wanted me, so much....

What the life I lead?
what I'll have in my life without them?


loving my family much, I'm going away from them, will they be happy if I send lakhs afar seas without seeing each other's face?

My dad or mom or my sibs never encouraged me to go away and me here standing away from them.

Thinking this stupid money will give my father and mother the support they need, but all they need is me.

They doesn't need money, they needed me, the physical support.

I realized life, I realized a great thing.

I feel like crumbling down, I felt a grey...
I felt like I fallen down, I forgot how to wake up... and then I heard the voice again...

"Hazel, come play with us, wanna play cards? " my sister asked me again.
"One second" as I said, I went to washroom to clear my tears, I'm happy finally I know to cry, my heart had cried, I'm human too.

"Hazel, want some fruits? " my asked while cutting some fruits
I nodded my head
"Mom, Hazel need fruit" my sister shouted while I laughed.
"Hazel, This Banana is nice, brought from Uncle's shop" my Dad picked up one I eagar as my mom placed cutted watermelon.

We all played cards.

it was amazing...

I looked all their faces, nothing I can do without seeing my parents and siblings face:)

Slapping my face...
let me, be with my family forever.


Thank you God for this realisation.

© Hazel