My Princessa,
I reallyyyyyy hoped you liked your birthday presents. I am so very sorry that I got them to you late, the day before your birthday I came down with covid pnuemonia.
as soon as I was able to get out of bed and drive all the way out to your house, I did. I hope you don't think that I forgot or didn't care.
thank you for video chatting me on Xmas. it was so good to see your beautiful face, you're growing up so fast.
Ashleigh told me that you didn't want to facetime me anymore because I cried last time we did. I know we didn't talk but a few minutes, and I am sorry if I upset you by crying. I will probably cry Everytime I see you for the rest of my life bc I cannot help but feel so happy to see you and Its happy bittersweet tears bc I miss you so much and not knowing when the next time I'll see you or talk to you again breaks my heart. it hurts bc I want to be there, and I one day pray I'll have the chance to have you back in my life. because your brother and giavanna and Niko and you are the reason my heart beats and purpose to keep pushing in life , I just want a family and memories and happiness and to have the family you deserve from me as youd mommy, with Niko and i.
I'm sorry it hurts you that I'm not in there right now, but Chelsea Lynne, there's not a day that goes by the I don't miss you and keep waiting for the time to come for me to have you again. I'm sorry I have let you down, and hurt you, I'm sorry that I haven't been the best mom I should have been for you. but I tried. and I won't ever stop. you mean so much to me, and you'll always be somebody's Chelsea you'll be mine.
I'll never stop trying to be your mom. I'll never not be here, when your ready, I'll be waiting.
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