3 views
regret
part 1
It was my 12th std , the most crucial year for every studious student. The start was great as always but as times passed by I started getting lazy and the year went on like that . As my 11th had gone waste due to COVID lockdown and I was preparing for jee I had to bounce back in 12th n cover the backlogs which I didn't . I told my parents I would study at home n not go to college as it was a waste of time for me because the same would be taught in my coaching.My parents were supportive and let me study at home , so i requested the principal of my pre university college and submitted a fake doctor's certificate stating that I'm suffering from lower back ache and that I'll not be able to attend classes regularly. As I wished it was approved and I stayed home most of the times . As I'm addicted to watching movies and series, i spent most of my time either watching, eating or sleeping . The coaching classes went on and my backlogs started piling up . There was this guy who would stare at me and even i used to look at him . As it was COVID we always wore masks , so couldn't see his face which made me more curious.The only thing I knew about him was his name . Which i thought was a girl as I had seen that name in online classes during 11th. Apparently I had a mutual friend who is close to me so i asked him about the guy who happens to be his junior from school. That's when I got to know it was a boy. As soon as I got to know it was a boy , out of curiosity checked him on Instagram there was a account which was followed by my friend that's how I knew it was the same guy .
And when I saw him in the class he wore mask most of the time so never saw his face clearly. We would stare at eachother every day and when I went home i just couldn't stop thinking about him . One day randomly sent him a req and due to my profile picture he couldn't recognise it was me . He continued to look at me and it went on for a few days until one day i decided to text him . It went well and we had a short conversation after a day he texted me asking about one of the tests in coaching to which i replied and ended the conversation. He stated a casual conversation and since then we have never stopped talking.
This went on until December when the jee mains first attempt dates were finally out just before 20 days of exam . That never happened in the history of jee mains, infact it's against rules that the exam dates have to be out atleast 2 months prior to the examination. My biggest downfall started from here , the coaching hadn't completed the portion yet , and I had almost whole syllabus backlog , every day was depressing, I felt helpless not able to figure out how to study , how to complete portion and backlogs , I still didn't give up i started study consistently for 6+ hours every day but it wasn't enough to cover anything. The biggest mistake was I didn't have deadlines nor targets which is why I could never complete my portion. The days went by and i completed all the easy lessons and went to write the exam . I was very nervous before the exam not able to figure out how to revise, i somehow revised inorganic and all the theory part and went to write the exam
It was my 12th std , the most crucial year for every studious student. The start was great as always but as times passed by I started getting lazy and the year went on like that . As my 11th had gone waste due to COVID lockdown and I was preparing for jee I had to bounce back in 12th n cover the backlogs which I didn't . I told my parents I would study at home n not go to college as it was a waste of time for me because the same would be taught in my coaching.My parents were supportive and let me study at home , so i requested the principal of my pre university college and submitted a fake doctor's certificate stating that I'm suffering from lower back ache and that I'll not be able to attend classes regularly. As I wished it was approved and I stayed home most of the times . As I'm addicted to watching movies and series, i spent most of my time either watching, eating or sleeping . The coaching classes went on and my backlogs started piling up . There was this guy who would stare at me and even i used to look at him . As it was COVID we always wore masks , so couldn't see his face which made me more curious.The only thing I knew about him was his name . Which i thought was a girl as I had seen that name in online classes during 11th. Apparently I had a mutual friend who is close to me so i asked him about the guy who happens to be his junior from school. That's when I got to know it was a boy. As soon as I got to know it was a boy , out of curiosity checked him on Instagram there was a account which was followed by my friend that's how I knew it was the same guy .
And when I saw him in the class he wore mask most of the time so never saw his face clearly. We would stare at eachother every day and when I went home i just couldn't stop thinking about him . One day randomly sent him a req and due to my profile picture he couldn't recognise it was me . He continued to look at me and it went on for a few days until one day i decided to text him . It went well and we had a short conversation after a day he texted me asking about one of the tests in coaching to which i replied and ended the conversation. He stated a casual conversation and since then we have never stopped talking.
This went on until December when the jee mains first attempt dates were finally out just before 20 days of exam . That never happened in the history of jee mains, infact it's against rules that the exam dates have to be out atleast 2 months prior to the examination. My biggest downfall started from here , the coaching hadn't completed the portion yet , and I had almost whole syllabus backlog , every day was depressing, I felt helpless not able to figure out how to study , how to complete portion and backlogs , I still didn't give up i started study consistently for 6+ hours every day but it wasn't enough to cover anything. The biggest mistake was I didn't have deadlines nor targets which is why I could never complete my portion. The days went by and i completed all the easy lessons and went to write the exam . I was very nervous before the exam not able to figure out how to revise, i somehow revised inorganic and all the theory part and went to write the exam
