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What's In A Name
It was the fall of the last great house, the name of Tzai. They had thrived for generations and been bankers, doctors, politicians and at rare times nobles. It was a name that had always thrived, always accomplished and always succeeded; but not now. Now they were at an impasse. Their family line died with their son and daughter. A son who was gay, and a daughter who was barren. The old couple felt a mixture of emotions, from anger, pity, pain and most of all, shame.
"You have both let us down." They had called a family intervention, this thing was telling on the old man's health and the stress of that was affecting the old woman too. The old man shifted uneasily in his wicker chair. It was the one remnant of his old life. He had built his new since leaving home at fifteen, and created quite an empire. He ruled it with an iron fist and little in the way of leniency.
"All you had to do was provide me an heir. Our family name would go from strength to strength, but now it will die and wither."
The mother had tears in her eyes as she looked across the very grand shiny best quality marble table in their expensively furnished mansion.
"We gave you the best of everything and this was all we asked in return." She was so sad to be having this conversation and her husband patted her hand reassuringly.
The son was a very handsome man. His temper was quick to flare because so many times in his life he'd had to learn to defend himself. Now he spoke freely.
"We meant no disrespect, but we could not do what you asked." His eyes were locked onto his father in defiance. Cool blue met solemn brown.
"But regardless," replied his father coldly, "you both have failed us and your ancestors. You failed to give us a Tzai to continue our bloodline. Even a daughter would have sufficed, but you will not even do that."
It was their petite pretty daughter who then could not refrain from speaking.
"But I did all the tests and cannot have children. I went through painful IVF for you, and it took its toll both mentally and physically."
"We know," said her mother quickly, "and we saw and appreciated what you went through, but still it failed. Your father has built something special and unique from nothing. Before we die we want to know there is someone who will inherit this beyond you both."
The daughter was trying to contain her anger.
"But we both offered to adopt."
"But that is not blood. That is not a true Tzai descendant. It will be raised as family, but it will not be true family."
So pronounced her father in absolute unequivocal fact as he saw it.
The children looked at one another as if their patience was hanging by a thread. The parents did pretty much the same thing. This was an age old argument, with the exception that this time their parents had asked them to keep their respective partners out of this conversation.
"This is for family only," their mother had said on the phone. And both had independently protested that to them their partners were most emphatically family. "But dear," their mother had tried to sound at least a trifle apologetic, "for what we have to say it is private business for your ears only."
So both children had attended with some trepidation. They secretly thought their father might be retiring, he was well passed that age after all. Or God forbid one of them was ill, or some other dramatic news. They hadn't realised this age old chestnut of an issue would be surfacing again. They were tired of it. To them it was no issue at all. Nothing short of a miracle self spawned baby was going to appease them.
At one point the son had even thought of surrogacy as a viable option. But on reflection, and chatting to his husband, both said they would be doing it not for them, nor the child, but for his parents alone. It was a tough call, but they were both not ready to have that sort of commitment for someone else's benefit. They enjoyed their life and wanted to continue living it. The sister and her husband had decided to adopt anyway after their failures to conceive even with scientific help. They'd been down the complimentary medicine route too, the healers and mystics, the constant assessments and pressure. Now they were in the process of adopting a baby girl from Sudan named Ayeesha. But the news had not gone down well by their parents who two weeks later called the meeting.
"And so then to this." The father looked very serious. Both parents were now poker faced and their children knew from past experience this would be a big announcement.
"Up to now we have always spoilt you, always given you what you felt you needed. But now, when it comes down to it, you failed to give us what we feel we need. Therefore, I am cutting you both out of our wills. Our fortune will pass to our bloodline to inherit, or not at all!"
The children were shocked and both said in unison," but we ARE your bloodline!"
"No, you are a disappointment to us." The mother was flat but firm. No anger in her voice, just conviction.
The father interjected," we want a true Tzai to continue our family honour, and if there isn't one there will be no legacy handed down."
"But WE are continuing the family honour," the son said emphatically.
"No," his mother replied," there is no honour in children who do not respect their own parents. There is little honour in that."
And with this disagreement echoing round the room for some time, that was the fall of the house of Tzai. Their lineage could be traced back over ten generations. The father had a family tree proudly displayed in their entrance hall depicting their roots and the branches of old. Today that tree was uprooted in dramatic fashion. Both parents cried that night for the shame and disappointment they felt their children had brought them. They hadn't wanted to do this thing, but it was a last ditched effort to make them realise just what it meant to them to have their line continued so they might be remembered by future Tzai family members.
The children cried that night too, in the arms of their loving partners. They had found beautiful spouses to be with, but this was not enough for their parents. They had stood on their own two feet and yes, they'd been supported too, but wasn't that the way of a loving parents? They'd both known how much it meant that Tzai line was added to, but to them their natural extensions of the husbands and shortly Ayeesha too, WERE family! All they saw was that they had been discounted, they felt tossed aside and yet they were Tzai. If this is what it meant to be a true Tzai member they didn't want it. Both brother and sister decided from that point onwards they were no longer Tzai themselves, they had their husband's name, and that was family enough for them. Nobody spoke to their parents for years.
A decade or more later Ayeesha had done a school project on ancestry. She'd researched her dad's side and wanted to look into her mum's. She didn't see her grandparents at all, but she'd found a phone number secretly for them. She was an inquisitive and bright happy child. She was full of enthusiasm, and though her name was not Tzai, she was keen to know who she was descended from so that she might tell her children in the future. She was very nervous and rang from a payphone they had at school for emergency use.
"Hello?" came an old woman's voice.
"Hello, you don't know me, but I'm your granddaughter Ayeesha Mezu....."
Names are important. There is strength in a name, there is more than just how it is pronounced or who it represents. A person is their name it is true. They should own it and imbue it with positivity. But this is NOT done solely or only by increasing a bloodline, it is done by your actions and deeds. A person and ergo their name is remembered by who they helped, and what kindnesses and important deeds they did. Even little things bring about those special ways that individuals are revered and applauded and admired by later generations. Family isn't just about bloodline, it's about love. Love brings a bond and connects people. It is what binds and helps cement lasting memories. Never forget that true family, and the means of perpetuating the name, is from love and loving. Embrace those you know, and those you don't and pull them warmly into your circle. It's not about the family name, but about who YOU are that gets remembered and has longevity. In remembering that they will still ask "and what was their name?". 🙏
© .Garry Saunders
"You have both let us down." They had called a family intervention, this thing was telling on the old man's health and the stress of that was affecting the old woman too. The old man shifted uneasily in his wicker chair. It was the one remnant of his old life. He had built his new since leaving home at fifteen, and created quite an empire. He ruled it with an iron fist and little in the way of leniency.
"All you had to do was provide me an heir. Our family name would go from strength to strength, but now it will die and wither."
The mother had tears in her eyes as she looked across the very grand shiny best quality marble table in their expensively furnished mansion.
"We gave you the best of everything and this was all we asked in return." She was so sad to be having this conversation and her husband patted her hand reassuringly.
The son was a very handsome man. His temper was quick to flare because so many times in his life he'd had to learn to defend himself. Now he spoke freely.
"We meant no disrespect, but we could not do what you asked." His eyes were locked onto his father in defiance. Cool blue met solemn brown.
"But regardless," replied his father coldly, "you both have failed us and your ancestors. You failed to give us a Tzai to continue our bloodline. Even a daughter would have sufficed, but you will not even do that."
It was their petite pretty daughter who then could not refrain from speaking.
"But I did all the tests and cannot have children. I went through painful IVF for you, and it took its toll both mentally and physically."
"We know," said her mother quickly, "and we saw and appreciated what you went through, but still it failed. Your father has built something special and unique from nothing. Before we die we want to know there is someone who will inherit this beyond you both."
The daughter was trying to contain her anger.
"But we both offered to adopt."
"But that is not blood. That is not a true Tzai descendant. It will be raised as family, but it will not be true family."
So pronounced her father in absolute unequivocal fact as he saw it.
The children looked at one another as if their patience was hanging by a thread. The parents did pretty much the same thing. This was an age old argument, with the exception that this time their parents had asked them to keep their respective partners out of this conversation.
"This is for family only," their mother had said on the phone. And both had independently protested that to them their partners were most emphatically family. "But dear," their mother had tried to sound at least a trifle apologetic, "for what we have to say it is private business for your ears only."
So both children had attended with some trepidation. They secretly thought their father might be retiring, he was well passed that age after all. Or God forbid one of them was ill, or some other dramatic news. They hadn't realised this age old chestnut of an issue would be surfacing again. They were tired of it. To them it was no issue at all. Nothing short of a miracle self spawned baby was going to appease them.
At one point the son had even thought of surrogacy as a viable option. But on reflection, and chatting to his husband, both said they would be doing it not for them, nor the child, but for his parents alone. It was a tough call, but they were both not ready to have that sort of commitment for someone else's benefit. They enjoyed their life and wanted to continue living it. The sister and her husband had decided to adopt anyway after their failures to conceive even with scientific help. They'd been down the complimentary medicine route too, the healers and mystics, the constant assessments and pressure. Now they were in the process of adopting a baby girl from Sudan named Ayeesha. But the news had not gone down well by their parents who two weeks later called the meeting.
"And so then to this." The father looked very serious. Both parents were now poker faced and their children knew from past experience this would be a big announcement.
"Up to now we have always spoilt you, always given you what you felt you needed. But now, when it comes down to it, you failed to give us what we feel we need. Therefore, I am cutting you both out of our wills. Our fortune will pass to our bloodline to inherit, or not at all!"
The children were shocked and both said in unison," but we ARE your bloodline!"
"No, you are a disappointment to us." The mother was flat but firm. No anger in her voice, just conviction.
The father interjected," we want a true Tzai to continue our family honour, and if there isn't one there will be no legacy handed down."
"But WE are continuing the family honour," the son said emphatically.
"No," his mother replied," there is no honour in children who do not respect their own parents. There is little honour in that."
And with this disagreement echoing round the room for some time, that was the fall of the house of Tzai. Their lineage could be traced back over ten generations. The father had a family tree proudly displayed in their entrance hall depicting their roots and the branches of old. Today that tree was uprooted in dramatic fashion. Both parents cried that night for the shame and disappointment they felt their children had brought them. They hadn't wanted to do this thing, but it was a last ditched effort to make them realise just what it meant to them to have their line continued so they might be remembered by future Tzai family members.
The children cried that night too, in the arms of their loving partners. They had found beautiful spouses to be with, but this was not enough for their parents. They had stood on their own two feet and yes, they'd been supported too, but wasn't that the way of a loving parents? They'd both known how much it meant that Tzai line was added to, but to them their natural extensions of the husbands and shortly Ayeesha too, WERE family! All they saw was that they had been discounted, they felt tossed aside and yet they were Tzai. If this is what it meant to be a true Tzai member they didn't want it. Both brother and sister decided from that point onwards they were no longer Tzai themselves, they had their husband's name, and that was family enough for them. Nobody spoke to their parents for years.
A decade or more later Ayeesha had done a school project on ancestry. She'd researched her dad's side and wanted to look into her mum's. She didn't see her grandparents at all, but she'd found a phone number secretly for them. She was an inquisitive and bright happy child. She was full of enthusiasm, and though her name was not Tzai, she was keen to know who she was descended from so that she might tell her children in the future. She was very nervous and rang from a payphone they had at school for emergency use.
"Hello?" came an old woman's voice.
"Hello, you don't know me, but I'm your granddaughter Ayeesha Mezu....."
Names are important. There is strength in a name, there is more than just how it is pronounced or who it represents. A person is their name it is true. They should own it and imbue it with positivity. But this is NOT done solely or only by increasing a bloodline, it is done by your actions and deeds. A person and ergo their name is remembered by who they helped, and what kindnesses and important deeds they did. Even little things bring about those special ways that individuals are revered and applauded and admired by later generations. Family isn't just about bloodline, it's about love. Love brings a bond and connects people. It is what binds and helps cement lasting memories. Never forget that true family, and the means of perpetuating the name, is from love and loving. Embrace those you know, and those you don't and pull them warmly into your circle. It's not about the family name, but about who YOU are that gets remembered and has longevity. In remembering that they will still ask "and what was their name?". 🙏
© .Garry Saunders
