Do you ever feel trapped? I don’t mean physically but mentally and emotionally. Have you ever told someone that you were fine when in fact you were barely holding on ? Well that is the kind of person that I am . It wasn’t always like this , I used to be running around with friends having the time of my life but many unfortunate events changed me entirely. I became locked in an empty room . Sadness is this monster that everyone eventually meets . Sadness is expressed in many ways , maybe you cry or maybe you smile and get on with your day while it follows you around. I use my mask every day , my mask of happiness, to trick people into believing that I’m truly at peace and nothing could go wrong when in fact so many terrible events are going on around me . I use my mask more often then you would think. I use it around friends and even family . Why ? Well it’s because I’m caged like an animal. No one to confide in and no one to cry to . Just me , myself and I . Sadness never really goes away , it’s always there just like your shadow . So how do I deal with blackness ? Well the truth is I don’t . I keep it deep inside me and hold on tight to any bit of light I can find . Many events have caused me this suffocating blanket of darkness . One of the biggest ones is my mam having Crohn’s disease .

As a young child my mam was...