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Flickering Scars Of Love
But What if you are found wanting !?
What, If I am found wanting !?
We, human beings are too fool when it comes to take a decision. or to move on. Our whole life went complaining for what we have lost and for that, which is attainable but I guess, sometimes, you kept on trying in a hope to get what you find suitable and so was the case with Jane. In her entire life, she had never demanded anything except love and that was the only thing that remained unattainable.
"God, You love people more than we do. Then, why have you done this to me? Why, only me ? Why have you put me in such a stance where neither can I get him nor he wants to be mine. I ask "Why" . While censuring, tears were continuously rolling down her eyes and Jane wasn't able to stop them even give a pause perhaps the trash of memories was overloaded now and she couldn't balance of opt what to do and what not to. Charles wasn't there right at the moment and perhaps couldn't even feel the essence of the pain, she was going through. Love was everything until they knew one another's intentions and the very moment, truth was revealed, everything got to get changed. Couple of best moment were there that Jane wouldn't skipped from her good books at any cost though everything was changing slowly and gradually. Afterall, it was becoming difficult for her to maintain a balance of pain and gain as she cherished a lush life thought her 22 years of life. Everytime, Charles didn't remind her of anything rather everything remind her of him . The golden time, when they were together even after a severe fight, a time when they were known as love birds, a time when they both stood infront of others to rescue one another, a time when he taught her the meaning of love and... and the time when she accepted him wholeheartedly . As love doesn't demand anything but the "beloved"and believing firm in that, they both entered in the world of accomplishing dreams .
They were sitting in the same restaurant where Charles met Jane for the first time and soon after encountering, Jane begin to confess that she had fallen in love . Charles smiled after this cute little confession but never revealed whether he had the same feelings or not. He nodded in "yes", perhaps wanted to give a gesture of having same feelings for her . With a continuous session of 3 hours,they bid farewell to each other temporary as this meetup session was never gonna end until it ruined the lives permanently as it is the matter of "Love" and love only teaches the tactics of fighting a war but not the life. After 6-7 months, both Charles and James were somehow aware of one another's pyschee physically as if this relation had any sort of emotional essence, then dreams wouldn't shattered. It was a cold night of December when Jane asked Charles, where he finds their love bond and what destination it has ? Sometimes , what we want to hear perhaps not come true based on false expectations and that point in our life becomes a climax later on . Charles, who couldn't make any emotional attachment from last 6-7 months was nothing but a failure . "Listen Jane, I liked you for being you and I adore you the most in my life, but it doesn't mean that I would get married and bear you till life ends. I don't have a strong feelings like you to be bound in "Nikkah" as it is most pious relation in the world but I don't deserve it . That's it " . Jane's good expectations made to change into despair and a never healing break age started to proceed. His words were hitting her directly, continously and were wrenching her beautiful innocent heart . In a state of misery, she never said anything except " Alright Charles, Good Night".
"Are You Okay !? "
"Yes, I Am "
"Why are You Silent Babe"
"Man ! I am feeling sleepy. Nothing much "
"Are you sure you want to sleep or you didn't expected this answer "
"No, Man! It's not the case. I have failed loving piously and that's why my love will keep porous :)"
"Umm... Please never blame "Love". Actually I'm not suitable for you, I'm worst . You are a pure soul whom everyone deserve but not me. You will see that someone would marry you beauty and you both will cherish the life"
"Thank you for all these concerns. Take Care"
"Take care too My Lady"
Conversation became very formal as if Jane didn't even knew him . Charles kept on texting her on daily basis but their chat couldn't turned informal it at least the way it was before and why would it be ? This was a question . If truth has been revealed, then why to carry the burden of Love, why to drag own self into a world of hell ?Why to tie up in a relation that isn't strong enough to be hold till death . Couple of questions were rising again and again to ponder whether their love would get stable again or will it go this way without any feelings. With limited conversation, Jane was adapting to live without Charles, a man without whom she never considered to breath,and now the moment, she decided to adapt silence.
"Hello My Lady, How are you doing "
"Em good and you !"
"Em Good too. Hopefully, I didn't disturb you."
"Yes"
"Alright, So I want to see the beautiful face of my Lady. Come on. Go Ahead and have blessed insight"
"Sorry , I Don't click photos now, You may see the old ones"
"Why So !? Now you will tease your beloved this way ?"
" Excuse Me . Man ! I have buried my love deep down in a very young age. So, you better not to use this word from now on. Also I'll not tease you anymore"
"Umm... but... I'm Sorry"
"You don't need to be sorry actually. Fault is all mine"
"Wait,What !? Fault ! "
"Yes,Fault. A fault of making love . Thank you for everything you did for me Charles. I'll always adore you Man "
"Jane ... Em so....sor... Sorry..."
"I've learnt that love is worth and what I opt was only a cheap initiative. May you get lifetime happiness that you couldn't get in my presence. May you find a true love and a soul mate who could provide you with unconditional love. Bb Bye :)"
In love, One had to live a lush life like Charles and other had to suffer lifelong as did Jane. She had confined herself in the recollection from where she never moved .Tears had iced in her gazelle eyes and hence, every time when she read the old messages and see the old pictures, tears start to roll down :'(
© Azka Abbas
What, If I am found wanting !?
We, human beings are too fool when it comes to take a decision. or to move on. Our whole life went complaining for what we have lost and for that, which is attainable but I guess, sometimes, you kept on trying in a hope to get what you find suitable and so was the case with Jane. In her entire life, she had never demanded anything except love and that was the only thing that remained unattainable.
"God, You love people more than we do. Then, why have you done this to me? Why, only me ? Why have you put me in such a stance where neither can I get him nor he wants to be mine. I ask "Why" . While censuring, tears were continuously rolling down her eyes and Jane wasn't able to stop them even give a pause perhaps the trash of memories was overloaded now and she couldn't balance of opt what to do and what not to. Charles wasn't there right at the moment and perhaps couldn't even feel the essence of the pain, she was going through. Love was everything until they knew one another's intentions and the very moment, truth was revealed, everything got to get changed. Couple of best moment were there that Jane wouldn't skipped from her good books at any cost though everything was changing slowly and gradually. Afterall, it was becoming difficult for her to maintain a balance of pain and gain as she cherished a lush life thought her 22 years of life. Everytime, Charles didn't remind her of anything rather everything remind her of him . The golden time, when they were together even after a severe fight, a time when they were known as love birds, a time when they both stood infront of others to rescue one another, a time when he taught her the meaning of love and... and the time when she accepted him wholeheartedly . As love doesn't demand anything but the "beloved"and believing firm in that, they both entered in the world of accomplishing dreams .
They were sitting in the same restaurant where Charles met Jane for the first time and soon after encountering, Jane begin to confess that she had fallen in love . Charles smiled after this cute little confession but never revealed whether he had the same feelings or not. He nodded in "yes", perhaps wanted to give a gesture of having same feelings for her . With a continuous session of 3 hours,they bid farewell to each other temporary as this meetup session was never gonna end until it ruined the lives permanently as it is the matter of "Love" and love only teaches the tactics of fighting a war but not the life. After 6-7 months, both Charles and James were somehow aware of one another's pyschee physically as if this relation had any sort of emotional essence, then dreams wouldn't shattered. It was a cold night of December when Jane asked Charles, where he finds their love bond and what destination it has ? Sometimes , what we want to hear perhaps not come true based on false expectations and that point in our life becomes a climax later on . Charles, who couldn't make any emotional attachment from last 6-7 months was nothing but a failure . "Listen Jane, I liked you for being you and I adore you the most in my life, but it doesn't mean that I would get married and bear you till life ends. I don't have a strong feelings like you to be bound in "Nikkah" as it is most pious relation in the world but I don't deserve it . That's it " . Jane's good expectations made to change into despair and a never healing break age started to proceed. His words were hitting her directly, continously and were wrenching her beautiful innocent heart . In a state of misery, she never said anything except " Alright Charles, Good Night".
"Are You Okay !? "
"Yes, I Am "
"Why are You Silent Babe"
"Man ! I am feeling sleepy. Nothing much "
"Are you sure you want to sleep or you didn't expected this answer "
"No, Man! It's not the case. I have failed loving piously and that's why my love will keep porous :)"
"Umm... Please never blame "Love". Actually I'm not suitable for you, I'm worst . You are a pure soul whom everyone deserve but not me. You will see that someone would marry you beauty and you both will cherish the life"
"Thank you for all these concerns. Take Care"
"Take care too My Lady"
Conversation became very formal as if Jane didn't even knew him . Charles kept on texting her on daily basis but their chat couldn't turned informal it at least the way it was before and why would it be ? This was a question . If truth has been revealed, then why to carry the burden of Love, why to drag own self into a world of hell ?Why to tie up in a relation that isn't strong enough to be hold till death . Couple of questions were rising again and again to ponder whether their love would get stable again or will it go this way without any feelings. With limited conversation, Jane was adapting to live without Charles, a man without whom she never considered to breath,and now the moment, she decided to adapt silence.
"Hello My Lady, How are you doing "
"Em good and you !"
"Em Good too. Hopefully, I didn't disturb you."
"Yes"
"Alright, So I want to see the beautiful face of my Lady. Come on. Go Ahead and have blessed insight"
"Sorry , I Don't click photos now, You may see the old ones"
"Why So !? Now you will tease your beloved this way ?"
" Excuse Me . Man ! I have buried my love deep down in a very young age. So, you better not to use this word from now on. Also I'll not tease you anymore"
"Umm... but... I'm Sorry"
"You don't need to be sorry actually. Fault is all mine"
"Wait,What !? Fault ! "
"Yes,Fault. A fault of making love . Thank you for everything you did for me Charles. I'll always adore you Man "
"Jane ... Em so....sor... Sorry..."
"I've learnt that love is worth and what I opt was only a cheap initiative. May you get lifetime happiness that you couldn't get in my presence. May you find a true love and a soul mate who could provide you with unconditional love. Bb Bye :)"
In love, One had to live a lush life like Charles and other had to suffer lifelong as did Jane. She had confined herself in the recollection from where she never moved .Tears had iced in her gazelle eyes and hence, every time when she read the old messages and see the old pictures, tears start to roll down :'(
© Azka Abbas
