I repeat, losing a child is not easy. It is definitely not a walk in the park. It has to be the longest journey anyone can ever travel, the most biggest scar anyone can ever acquire, the greatest agony where you feel like you can never wake up the next day and tell a tale. You have not just lost a human being, but you lost your heart because you start to feel like your heart has been ripped out of you and you are just breathing because of luck. Even your spine lose function that you have to carry yourself and drag your feet. You feel like the universe is resting on your shoulders and too pale to can even move. Some days come easy whereas other days are worse, feeling like you have been hit by a thunder. Some days are normal but some days you just wanna spend the rest of your life at the graveyard with your child. Sometimes you even start to lose a purpose of life because it is unbearable not to be able to hold him/her again, by that time your tears could even fill the vast of an ocean. Every dream in the middle of the day, during the day you see your child sleeping next to you hugging you, smiling at you and the moment you open your eyes calling him/her it clicks that it was just a dream, s/he is gone and never coming back. For the first time in a longest time I saw my mother's tears and I felt her pain. For the first time in the longest time, strong became weak, joy became anger, questions that could never have answers being left unanswered. There she was, marked by a scar that could never heal. And you will hear people say "Oh I understand your pain. Oh I can imagine" close your mouth, you understand nothing. No one can ever understand that pain if you have never been there yourself. I understand there is a pain of losing a father, a mother or a husband, but this one of losing the fruit of your womb..... let me stop here!!!
© HOPE.N❤️