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Brother Stews Brother's Stew
Ah, the biblical tale of Jacob and Esau, where sibling rivalry meets a hot bowl of lentil stew. Let's dive into the melodrama with the same enthusiasm as a theologian at a Vegas buffet, shall we? So, Jacob's slaving away, probably using some ancient recipe that's more bland than the plot of a reality TV show, and lo and behold, in stumbles Esau, the poster child for "hangry." This guy's so famished, he could eat a donkey's sandal and ask for seconds.

Now, Jacob, not exactly the poster boy for altruism, sees an opportunity. He's like, "Oh, you want some of my unspectacular pottage? No problemo, just sign over that pesky little thing called your birthright." And what's a birthright, you ask? Oh, just the ancestral claim to the Promised Land, the future of their family line, and the right to be the firstborn's pride and joy. No biggie, right?

Esau, bless his hungry soul, is ready to sell his soul for a spoonful of this red lentil concoction. "I'm about to kick the bucket anyway," he says, "What's a birthright when you're staring down the grim reaper?" Now, hold your horses, because this isn't just any birthright; it's the kind of deal that would make even the most stoic monk say, "Hold up, I've got dibs on that!" But no, Esau's too busy drooling over a stew that probably had less flavor than a cardboard sandwich.

Jacob, the shrewd businessman of the family, jumps at the chance like a cat on a laser pointer. "Swear to me," he says, because apparently, in ancient times, a man's saliva was as binding as a notarized contract. And what does Esau do? He spits out a promise faster than a toddler asked to eat their veggies. The deal is sealed, and for a mere meal, he gives up what could've been his for a lifetime.

So, Jacob, now the proud owner of a birthright that's as cheap as a knockoff Rolex on a street corner, dishes out some bread and lentils. Esau scarfs it down like it's the last food on Earth, which, given the scarcity of takeout options back then, might not have been far from the truth. And off he goes, probably still feeling faint from the sheer weight of his boneheaded decision.

And thus, the story goes, Esau despised his birthright. But let's not forget the context, folks. This is a tale from a time when the idea of a balanced diet was a myth and the concept of "future planning" meant not getting mauled by a wild animal tomorrow. So, when the text says Esau despised his birthright, it's really just saying he was a bad investor. Who wouldn't trade eternal land rights for a quick snack? It's like selling your house for a lifetime supply of avocados. Sure, you'll have guac on tap, but where will you sleep?

This delightful exchange is not just a story about a bad meal choice. Oh no, it's a theological smorgasbord of divine right, trickery, and the age-old question of nature versus nurture. The birthright was supposed to be a spiritual and cultural inheritance, but Jacob's playing Monopoly with it like it's a get-out-of-jail-free card. And the scientific inconsistency? Well, unless lentils had magical powers back then, I'm pretty sure fainting from hunger doesn't equate to being at death's door.

But let's not let a little thing like reality spoil our biblical fun. This narrative is like a divine episode of "Let's Make a Deal," with Jacob playing the role of Monty Hall, offering a prize that's either a lifetime of stew or eternal blessings. And poor Esau? He's the contestant who goes for the stew every time. So, the next time you're faced with a bowl of lentils, remember the fate of the man who valued them over a birthright. And maybe pack a snack, just in case your sibling tries to make a deal with you.

© Travis Allen King aka DTH