I lost count already on how many times I've been puking this morning. My head is spinning and I almost lost my energy. It looks like I can just sleep on the bathroom floor. My mother came in and help to caress my back.

" You are aware of the state you are in, right? " I lean back to the bathroom wall. I have a suspicion but I am still not sure yet.

" What are you going to do now? Should I call him?" I immediately snatch her wrist, preventing her from making the phone call.

" No, mom. I don't want to force him on anything," I said. Let me go to the hospital first, and I will decide after that. It's a struggle to move around whenever I am in this condition. But I had to.

I waited nervously from outside the doctor's room. I hope my guts are wrong. Namjoon and I are on our separate ways. And with my mental state right now, I think it will be very much vulnerable if I keep it through. I am on my own. I am scared and there is so much more clouding my mind.

" Ms. Min Yeo Na,"

The white wall room seems much more smaller to me. Like it was shrunk. Maybe it just my anxiety, but it does suffocating me. I try to take a deep breath while waiting for the doctor. The nurse starting to put a cold gel on my stomach. As soon as the transducer touch my belly, an image appeared on the screen. I can clearly see a small little human displayed on the screen. My heart was thumping rapidly. My chest tightens and I started to have a heavy heart. I can't hold back my tears. The nurse keeps calming me for only God knows how many times. I had mixed feelings and obviously confused.

" Your gestational age is around 10 to 12 weeks now, it's meant you're almost over your first trimester. Congratulations on your pregnancy," the doctor said. She handed me a copy of the scan picture. I stare at it for some time.

" Is it safe if I wanted to abort? The baby's father, we're no longer together," the doctor didn't exactly say yes or no. She is literally trying to talk to me through it. I don't know. My mind is empty for the time...