"Music from the jazz band had the place jumping. I was in my dressing room out back and from all the noise I could tell the place was packed. It was the greatest feeling in the world being on that stage. Nothing mattered more than being there front and centre. Have you ever had that feeling? that feeling of complete fulfilment."

Lola was talking and she looked like she was back. Back in time. Living the night she found and lost her love as she had put it. I thought for a brief moment and knew the answer.

"No. Nothing has ever meant that much."

I felt sad admitting that. I had nothing special in my life no spark nothing that got me up in the morning. I'm twenty-two and just going through life heading towards a long slow boring death. Talking to Lola was soothing and enjoyable. I waved a waiter over and ordered two more drinks.

"Hey, Lola is this kid hassling you? I can kick him out if you want. You Know That the boss likes you"

"Thanks, Stan I'm good just bring the drinks."

The waiter left and I dabbed the sweat from my forehead with my pocket-handkerchief. Lola was smiling at me. I couldn't tell if she was coming on to me or found my fear funny.

"I told you, kid, I like you. You're safe as long as I do."

She patted my thigh and ran her hand up slowly. as she got higher and I tensed and she laughed.

" Relax boy. I'm old enough to be your Grandma. Pluss I will never love again. In my dressing room sat in front of the mirror I finished putting on my lippy waiting for my call to the stage. As I checked myself making sure I looked as good as possible there was a tap at my door. I was called and I went to my stage. It wasn't anyone else's stage it was mine and always will be. I wore this dress that night."

The beer was going through me and the toilet was calling.

"Can I just stop you there for a moment Lola? I really got to use the bathroom."

"Go on kid I've got all night."

The urinal was filling up faster than it was emptying and it was taking my attention away from my surroundings. That's why I lost control of the hose when a hand landed on my shlder.

"I don't know your game boy but the boss has given me an order. If you upset Lola I get to break your knee caps. Do you understand?"

Rapidly I nodded up and down Shaking off at the same time. The meaty hand that had gripped me slapped me on the back.

"Good."