A Heart Like Mine

I know what you must be thinking: it is hard to love a heart like mine. the sudden stopping and starting and rewinding it does at all hours of the day. its great intensities. its infrequent victories. my skin must be made of winter because I am too frozen to be the warmth you thought you once saw in me. there are snowflakes in my marrow, icicles hanging like spears from my ribcage. every time you’ve tried to touch me I found scorch marks on my arms my hips and my neck. you look at me and I can see that you are lost. I can see all of the things a heart like mine has done -- the bruises on your chest, the circles beneath your eyes, the wanting fluttering of your fingertips.
my breath solidifies in the air when I say your name and yes I know, I know how frightening it is to watch my eyes empty all of the seawater I swallowed so long ago.
we are both so tired and I am so sorry.