I woke up in a barn with no memory of the events that transpired the day before. What kind of bender did I go on last night? Things have not been easy since the events of the massacre that took place not so long ago. I still hear the screams of my men, the cries from the women and children. It replays in my head while I'm awake and asleep and when I try to sleep it seems to play in slow motion while I dream or nightmare, you could say. The screams are haunting, I haven't been able to get a full night's rest. I'm so sleep deprived, I'm starting to have these spasms, muscle aches, joints stiffening to the point it becomes so unbearable, I start to drink; hoping it will numb me and knock me out. I'm not even picky about the kind of drink I down anymore; whatever will help knock my ass out, it's going down the hatch. I'm still puzzled I woke up in a barn. I thought to myself that maybe someone pulled a prank but no one here would do something like that.

Reports of livestock getting slaughtered had begun circulating again. The same circulation that went around before which led me and my men out to the cabin in the woods that led to their deaths. Farmers are getting frustrated, the town folk are getting anxious; this may be the time I need to get a new team together. Another opportunity won't open like this. I pleaded the case and talked about what had happened, I was met with jokes, mocking, laughter and a town drunk; a delusional man with an overactive imagination. No one was caring about the lives lost because surely I made that up as well. I did not expect this kind of reaction but I couldn't get mad at everyone, I couldn't condemn their jokes or laughter or name calling. How could I? I had nothing to show for the story I had told. The place where this took, the bodies, the blood, the sheer destruction; gone! All I had was the passion in my voice while telling the story, and that's all it ended up being to them and I can't fault then for that.

Through the excitement and frustration, I started to feel strange. I suddenly felt feverish; my bones started to ache and it felt like my muscles were stretching. My ears were ringing and my heart was about to come out of my chest. I figured this was it; this is how I'm going to go, a damn heart attack. In a panic I ran to my place, luckily for me it was just down the street from Town Hall. I stormed inside and raced to the bathroom upstairs. Breathing so heavily, I splashed some cold water on my face and neck. I plopped on my bed and my heart was still racing, bones now felt like they were breaking and muscles were on fire. What is happening to me?

I woke up the next morning in a field, I was naked and covered head to toe in blood. Saying I was scared and confused wouldn't describe it the way it should, I just can't find the right words, but I was froze. What sort of bender was I on indeed? Questions I have and I know the answers are going to be even harder getting, but I knew where I needed to go.



© M.J. Rhodes