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How I got depression?
Introduction.
I was born in Telam. A small village in Arunachal Pradesh. My date of birth is 15 January 1997.
My Story.
As a child I was like most other kids very playful and naughty,I had started my studies from kg 1. From kg 1 to class 8 I was in the same school,it was a private school with not so harsh but a good strict rules so that kids and youngsters would not move towards bad direction in life. After I passed class 8 my father(he is a teacher at a govt school of Telam that comprises of classes from 9 to 12)told me to study in his school which I did,he also did warned me about not to make freinds with bad students that would lead me in bad directions in life. I got admitted everything was working fine but due to my eager to feel or experience what it is like to smoke,drink or using things which makes you high I started to make freinds with those guys. One day one of my freind and me went to a river near our village and started smoking weeds. It was my first time and I didn't knew what was happening, I got high by using it and it felt really good and comfortable. That was my biggest mistake of my life. From then onwards I became more attracted towards weeds making myself move away from studies and families. It happened upto that time when I reached class 11, in between I got caught many times by my parents and also got a nice beating for it but I didn't paid much attention. When I was in class 12 I thought that I should leave this smoking and weeds for ever,which I did for one year. Then after sometime the final exams for Class 12 was announced by cbse. I did really good there scoring 72%(notice I was in arts stream not science). Everyone was happy especially my sisters and my parent. Then it was time to go to college for further studies. I got admitted in Don Bosco college in Itanagar located in Arunachal Pradesh.Since it was far from my current home Telam(as my father is a teacher he got a quarter to live: a quarter is basically a home provided by govt to teachers to live) we had to search for hostels we didn't found a room in Don boscos hostel.But we got room in a private hostel running by a local guy.Then I got admitted there it was only for boys.After few days more students that got admission in Don Bosco came to that hostel where I was at seeking room to stay(it was a costly hostel with all the security fees and rents). After two days of our hostel manager closed the admission, one afternoon I went out to pee then I saw two guys there smoking weed they both were also a part of our hostel they were students.When I saw that sight I thought about my decision of not smoking this kind of things again but since I was also far away from my parent and was free at that time to do whatever I want(rules were there at our hostel but honestly it wasn't that strict as we thought it would be) I forgot about my oath and decisions and I approach them and introduce myself and asked them to let me join which they agreed.After doing that I went to my room and started sleeping while listening music in my earphones,it felt so good at that time it really felt like I was somewhere at the top of the world. Since then no turning back everyday was a weed day smoke,eat,sleep and mobile. First year it went on this way, also I felt very happy there even inside the class room.Teachers or lecturers were kind friendly and good.My result of first semester exam wasn't good I failed in one subject which is Elective English.
At the second year or second semester I still was an addicted guy infact I became so addicted that I didn't felt hungry and I didn't felt happy without using weed which was a serious problem.One day half year had passes I didn't knew what happened I suddenly wanted to leave that college because my mind and heart was creating such feeling and ideas which made me uncomfortable and very sad and then I left that collg it was quite a good college.My parents were in shocked when they heard me leaving college.After I reach home I told them what happened or what did I do there instead of studying.They got really sad.
After leaving that college and staying at my home for a few weeks I started showing signs of depression or bipolar disorder.Then after that current year ended I enrolled myself in another college named JNC a govt college.First college was a private college and second is a government college.I took a rent room to stay and study but instead of studying my craving become to huge I started searching for weeds again there and started it again like a hungry mad dog hungry for a bone or food.My parents called me in between to ask how was I doing I told them I was fine and iam not using any weeds anymore,I lied to them.There I stayed for two years addicted in weeds.Results were bad and also I started to develop a fear I side my heart I mean getting afraid suddenly without any reasons,always staying alone,walking with my head down.I started recalling my time which was when I stayed in Don Bosco thinking how different things could have been also I never felt happy as much as I did in Don bosco.One day my mom told me to leave that college due to me failing in second semester.
I went home after that just living a dull life without no aim no purpose and yes I also did smoked more for one month after I left JNC and when I was staying at home.I was 22 years old at that time.One day my parents without telling me took me to a Rehab centre I stayed there for a week only and came out of it,since then I left doing weeds and was living on drugs given by doctor.Four years already wasted 2years in Don Bosco and 2years in JNC plus one Year in home total five years(it was the year 2019 that time).Now in 2020 Nov 12 I'm writing this story and now still I'm suffering from frequent mood swings I think I have bipolar disorder I got admission again in a College.My parents are also in depression due to me they are heartbroken.But I think I can still do well in life and im gonna try to be a good human being and a successful person.
THANKS.
© All Rights Reserved
I was born in Telam. A small village in Arunachal Pradesh. My date of birth is 15 January 1997.
My Story.
As a child I was like most other kids very playful and naughty,I had started my studies from kg 1. From kg 1 to class 8 I was in the same school,it was a private school with not so harsh but a good strict rules so that kids and youngsters would not move towards bad direction in life. After I passed class 8 my father(he is a teacher at a govt school of Telam that comprises of classes from 9 to 12)told me to study in his school which I did,he also did warned me about not to make freinds with bad students that would lead me in bad directions in life. I got admitted everything was working fine but due to my eager to feel or experience what it is like to smoke,drink or using things which makes you high I started to make freinds with those guys. One day one of my freind and me went to a river near our village and started smoking weeds. It was my first time and I didn't knew what was happening, I got high by using it and it felt really good and comfortable. That was my biggest mistake of my life. From then onwards I became more attracted towards weeds making myself move away from studies and families. It happened upto that time when I reached class 11, in between I got caught many times by my parents and also got a nice beating for it but I didn't paid much attention. When I was in class 12 I thought that I should leave this smoking and weeds for ever,which I did for one year. Then after sometime the final exams for Class 12 was announced by cbse. I did really good there scoring 72%(notice I was in arts stream not science). Everyone was happy especially my sisters and my parent. Then it was time to go to college for further studies. I got admitted in Don Bosco college in Itanagar located in Arunachal Pradesh.Since it was far from my current home Telam(as my father is a teacher he got a quarter to live: a quarter is basically a home provided by govt to teachers to live) we had to search for hostels we didn't found a room in Don boscos hostel.But we got room in a private hostel running by a local guy.Then I got admitted there it was only for boys.After few days more students that got admission in Don Bosco came to that hostel where I was at seeking room to stay(it was a costly hostel with all the security fees and rents). After two days of our hostel manager closed the admission, one afternoon I went out to pee then I saw two guys there smoking weed they both were also a part of our hostel they were students.When I saw that sight I thought about my decision of not smoking this kind of things again but since I was also far away from my parent and was free at that time to do whatever I want(rules were there at our hostel but honestly it wasn't that strict as we thought it would be) I forgot about my oath and decisions and I approach them and introduce myself and asked them to let me join which they agreed.After doing that I went to my room and started sleeping while listening music in my earphones,it felt so good at that time it really felt like I was somewhere at the top of the world. Since then no turning back everyday was a weed day smoke,eat,sleep and mobile. First year it went on this way, also I felt very happy there even inside the class room.Teachers or lecturers were kind friendly and good.My result of first semester exam wasn't good I failed in one subject which is Elective English.
At the second year or second semester I still was an addicted guy infact I became so addicted that I didn't felt hungry and I didn't felt happy without using weed which was a serious problem.One day half year had passes I didn't knew what happened I suddenly wanted to leave that college because my mind and heart was creating such feeling and ideas which made me uncomfortable and very sad and then I left that collg it was quite a good college.My parents were in shocked when they heard me leaving college.After I reach home I told them what happened or what did I do there instead of studying.They got really sad.
After leaving that college and staying at my home for a few weeks I started showing signs of depression or bipolar disorder.Then after that current year ended I enrolled myself in another college named JNC a govt college.First college was a private college and second is a government college.I took a rent room to stay and study but instead of studying my craving become to huge I started searching for weeds again there and started it again like a hungry mad dog hungry for a bone or food.My parents called me in between to ask how was I doing I told them I was fine and iam not using any weeds anymore,I lied to them.There I stayed for two years addicted in weeds.Results were bad and also I started to develop a fear I side my heart I mean getting afraid suddenly without any reasons,always staying alone,walking with my head down.I started recalling my time which was when I stayed in Don Bosco thinking how different things could have been also I never felt happy as much as I did in Don bosco.One day my mom told me to leave that college due to me failing in second semester.
I went home after that just living a dull life without no aim no purpose and yes I also did smoked more for one month after I left JNC and when I was staying at home.I was 22 years old at that time.One day my parents without telling me took me to a Rehab centre I stayed there for a week only and came out of it,since then I left doing weeds and was living on drugs given by doctor.Four years already wasted 2years in Don Bosco and 2years in JNC plus one Year in home total five years(it was the year 2019 that time).Now in 2020 Nov 12 I'm writing this story and now still I'm suffering from frequent mood swings I think I have bipolar disorder I got admission again in a College.My parents are also in depression due to me they are heartbroken.But I think I can still do well in life and im gonna try to be a good human being and a successful person.
THANKS.
© All Rights Reserved
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