It is I
who never gave up on us. I knew deep down he didn't love me first. So I created a love story inside of my world to make it mutual. I was so Inlove with this thought
that it consumed and seperated me from I. I who had become fragmented memories and high-school puppy crushing. Now, I look back at the same pieces who once fulfilled me, these fragmented pieces all glaring at me now broken.
Broken, ashamed of every moment I let myself into, I let myself down. I allowed people to degrade me. I, feeling angry, because I ignored every sign so harshly.
I.
Am I the broken girl, with wounds unhealed.
Am I seeing the truth for what it truly is.
I.
I want to stop thinking of how much it hurts. Sometimes I feel like going back to our physical pain. That hurt less. Because this ache is so proud to stay. It hurts every part within me.
What hurt me the most?
I.
His behaviour towards me.
I.
The way I had failed to succeed in making his family accept and be proud of who I am. Where I come from.
The idea of failing at a so called "love marriage".
Facing the truth and having to explain myself to different people.
Having people pass their judgements once they hear the title
"Divorce."
I am carrying a guilt I need not carry.
I am carrying shame as I was made to step out of a home like I was a homeless person.
Who am I
As fragmented as I am, how do you see me God. Am I enough for you. Will I ever truly be enough to anyone.