When men are young they think they know everything and they do everything possible to make their point and hope to get it acrossed. When they find a woman, they try to hard to impress and do what they can to quickly move on to the next.

I wasn't this type of man. The first person I met and poured my love and soul into. I was in 7th grade when I met her, after high school, we got married at 17, pregnant by 18... Young I know. but never cheated, never lied, never argued. Everything I seen between my parents and grandparents I never experienced when I was with her. Sadly I lost my son and my beloved wife in a car accident which changed me into something I hate today.

I got in trouble with the law, which prevented me from joining the military. So after court was completed, I moved to Arizona and joined UAT, University of Advancing Technology, which I later after college I joined DynCorp International to learn how to do private security work. Shortly after I joined Freelance International which taught me Private Military Work which got me deployed to complete my mission with GOD, to end my life for taking the one true family I wished for my whole life, so I went to war with God. When the company went bankrupt I took that as a sign to stop trying, because throughout my time in service, I had 2 daughters who were taken from me because I worked too much to care for them, so I made it my mission to try to get them back, and because of the way I went through with it, I got arrested again for something I didn't do.

But I now have lost my way to find Love, to try again. I got one of my kids back and sadly have to wait till my second daughter turns 18 before trying to reach out, but I do want to feel loved again, and thus being the title, lost Courage.

But with all the dating apps I've tried, Facebook dating and all, it's hard to connect with real people, seeing how most people on the app are fake asf or hackers. But I still try, I may revert to finding my confidence and find my courage one day to speak up and try, even if I'm shut down, I will keep trying to find someone to love again. I believe there are special people you can connect with, "true love" some people believe there's only one maybe two people for every one person. But I believe that anyone can be that person if given a shot.

Women and Men need to start looking past the looks and start looking in the heart and soul. We all have our preferences "SWF & SAF" being my preference of Russian, British, Canadian, Asian and American women. Preferably Non-Smoker, but in the end we all will find out courage to find, meet and fall in love. Because in the end.

No one wants to be alone when they die. And everyone wants to make memories with people they love and maybe even have a family with.

So I hope you find your courage, love and lover and I wish you the happiness I once had, and am still currently seeking to have again.

© Inspiration & Motivation