I am tired;

I'm tired of you loving me.
I'm tired of you treating me like this because you love me.

Is this how you really love? Or is it just how your love is towards ME?

I saw how you treat others. I saw how you didn't deny or stop the advances of those people who's clearly interested to you.

Yet, I still continue to care for you, after you came home. Alcohol and perfumes lingering on your clothes. I saw how you treat your buddies with respect that you can't seem to give me. I saw how you treat your mother. I thought I would receive the same treatment because we're just the same, who loves and doted on you openly.

But why?
I endured those bad days
That turns into worst.
I endured those " Just stressful at work."
I endured your cold treatment and the sudden changes of attitude.

But still, why?
Why does it hurts so much
I told myself that I do not
deserve this much;
This much suffering
I had to go through
Because I love you.

But why?
Why, are you letting me go
Just like that?

You have been tired too.
To many times to count actually.
Been heartbroken whenever you told me
"Let's break up."
everytime you are drunk.
Yet I didn't give up,
opposite of what you are
doing right now.

I had only been tired ONCE.
Why aren't you telling me to stop?
Why aren't you telling me
"We can just talk this out."
That
"It doesn't have to be this way."
Or anything at all!
Why are you staying quiet?!

I am mad and disappointed;
Because yes!
I may be tired!
But this stupid heart of mine!
Continues to love you nonetheless.

I'm outside of our apartment
Waiting, waiting for you
To come, running after me
Because deep inside
I wish to stay.
I wanted for you to give me a reason.
Just one that's all.
So, I don't look like a fool
Fighting for our relationship
to stay afloat
when you're the very reason,
why there's a hole in that boat.

I wanted to see you
To also put some effort
In mending your mistake
But instead you add more
Things that needs to be mend
I guess, it is too much
for me to ask such favours.

© Bashful