La'Reyah an La'Taeyah
You mean the world to me
Irreverent to whether it's something they care to see
I'll never forgive myself for abandoning you in your time of need
How proud are you?
Arguing with me, failing a man who made his children a priority
How I pray she never had a thing for white boys
Thinking I was susceptible to her trifling ploys
Thought I was that fucking dumb
To the countless atrocities I've endured, I'm not numb
Should I post this on Instagram?
Will it have meaning?
I'll keep bleeding
Just to hope it turns into the love their receiving
Cause I always loved my children
The only form of happiness that was real to me
The only girls that loved me actually
My oldest saw me break down
She said "I'm here"
Opposed to what most of them thought, their actions made it painfully clear
Their professions were just something they found comfort hearing
I fell apart over love they wouldn't let me see
Just how they treat parents when they try to make their children a priority
I hope you don't understand how wrong it was to argue with someone that thought as much as I did
In place of that pain, I hope you remain stupid
Unaware of what you're doing
I lost so much hoping for an improvement
With the influence your family had, you never grew up
I wasn't good enough
You'd think it odd, I only had God when it got ridiculously tough
I have every reason to hate myself
The only thing that made me different from anyone else
I would've died long ago had I been on this journey by myself
Hoping one day the love that ate me up inside would be of some help
La'Reyah an La'Taeyah
I'd gladly hurt for eternity
So you know how much you meant to me, an how much I'd fight to be worthy
Something that only could've come from above
Mention my fucking name if you wanna see dumb?
A bullet through my head, that thin ass bed
I haven't hurt enough, if they can't feel my love
So they know where my head's at if I lose all this useless blood
If I die before the only job I wanted to do is done
If I ever had a reason to live it was you two
I'll never forgive myself for failing you
I never looked for my absent father
You girls were the only reason I was able to go farther
Why I don't feel the need to argue with people only concerned about the popularity they could attain
How anyone could listen to me an think I was just looking for someone to blame
A bum isn't the only one that needs to see a drastic change
We don't say anything
They'll profit just the same
If the roles were reversed, I wouldn't treat you the same
That'd mean I didn't grow at all, I wasn't different from the people that wanted to see me stuck in jail again
Drugs aren't the only thing making a killing tearing families apart
I wanted to give those girl's the world
To deem they deserved the same disgusting start, breaks my fucking heart!
I gotta Gameboy advance for witnessing your hateful plans
How could you think probation was a fair chance?
I wanna help you was just something you said
As if my priorities ever resided in your head?
La'Reyah an La'Taeyah
Know I meant every word
So you know what was true, an never as ugly as what they wanted you to hear
I wasn't worth knowing before I knew of a love I'd always hold dear
Remember who I am, if we never see eachother again
I'll do all I can to be there, unfortunately I cannot say for certain whether they'll honor it or treat me remotely fair
If you corner a man, his feeble mind will lean towards any sort of escape
To attempt to deal with the hole they made
You girls were not a mistake
I never feared the steps I had to make
They never acknowledged their weight
I don't deserve your forgiveness, they made my heartache a profitable business
Something you shouldn't have to witness, at least know that you...