When we were kids we sat under the tree eating milo from the tin while you showed me how to make a paper gun or a slingshot from the branch of a tree. "These will come in handy!" you pointed out" while I nodded my head agreeing with whatever you said.

You taught me how to sword fight with a broomstick; spin a top in the palm of my hands and even how flip a pokemon tazo like a pro. "Marbles are not for girls!" you said, "But you can keep my tigers eye!" and I knew it was only to make me feel better.

You told me I would always have you to protect me but just in case

"Here's how to do a sleeper" or to two feet someone troubling you;

"Punch him in the face!" you said; "They won't see it coming!" you drilled into my head.

You made me practice target shooting; bought me my very own pellet gun. We would put up cans on the fence and shoot them just for fun.

You cheered for me when I danced and joined my group so I wouldn't have to do it alone. "I got your back!" you said.

I spent my life being your shadow to learn whatever I could from you.

How to pray, how to believe even when I didn't feel I needed to, your confidence was out of this world and I wanted that too. The only thing you failed to teach me was how to live without you!

If I knew that eventually, you would leave me, and reach heaven's gates before me; I probably would have told you that I loved you more often or even told you that you are my hero, I am proud to call you my brother,

Now I wish I had said, stay don't go... I still need you bro!

The life we have lived was amazing, with some ups and some downs yet we managed it all because we had each other, now I stare at your picture on my desk, the silence is deafening, I know I must let go but I still need you bro!

#unbearableloss

© kesegiemoodley