Maybe I don't deserve to be happy.
Maybe I should have known that all along
Because every time I start to think I do,
The universe proves me wrong.

I'm losing everything that keeps me going
So what am I supposed to do?
Everything that makes me smile,
Myself, my sanity, and you.

It's all going to disappear
And all I can do is sit and watch
As seconds tick by and time runs out,
I'll sit here staring at a clock

When was the last time I could breath?
Why can't I remember?
Why do I feel like I'm suffocating,
And I will I feel this way forever?

When my peace becomes the weapon aimed at me during my war,
And the sun begins to set faster than it ever did before
When the hole in my chest grows bigger and bigger
I'm left thinking with myself,
God, just pull the trigger.

Rip it all away.
I don't want it anymore.
I don't want to be happy
I don't to hurt anymore
I don't want to breathe
I don't want to exist
I don't want to try
If it will always be like this

Because even the times when the weight seems to dissolve
The world soon reminds me I'm stuck
That two years is too long
And I'm running out of luck

Please let me out
I get it now, so stop.
Trying is useless,
You won't let me have my smile
Just let me rinse my mouth away
The taste it leaves is vile.

I tried to get better.
Perfect timing, don't you think?
This universe decided now was the time
To push me to my brink.

Do you want me to give it all up?
Is that what this is?
Is this just some sick game
To see what it takes to make me give?

I'm fucking exhausted,
Is that want you want to hear?
I can't take it anymore,
Am I not making myself clear??

I feel myself slipping
My head starts to spin
I lie my myself down and sleep
Because it's getting bad again

What else am I supposed to do?
I'm losing everything, I'm losing you.

So I'll just let myself get drunk on dreams
Until I can't tell the difference between fiction and reality

Because in a world that I can draw,
I can erase all of that pain.
So I'll shift myself to my perfect place,
And you'll never hear from me again.

I hope everyone is sorry
I hope they miss my light
I wanted to shine brighter than ever
But I guess I'm not worth that fight.

A million reasons to leave
To wish myself away
But I really just wanted one reason,
One person to convince me to stay.