Ring ring
Internal message
Seems I've been contacted by the regret collectors
I've avoided indulging in self mutilation
it's been hard for me to replace it
Regret
I avoid it but oh
Those collectors they come and they go
And lately they've been more persistent
Last year my debt took a hard rise
When my mental state took a sharp dive

Those collectors are heckling me
abuse is at its finest
When I know I deserve the refinement

Sometimes it's better to see the beauty in pain
Being humble is hot I like to say
Ok
The interest is rising by the day
And my capability of keeping up is in a weak way
I'm getting tired
I'm sinking
No higher
I've been paying off chunks
But the price to pay does aspire
Can't help but admire

Regret
It's Piling violently
I can't see around me
Moral paper work
I've gotta sign at least a hundred more
no wait make that four
Then tomorrow twice the eyesore
stacked above my head
I'm wishing for it to topple
smother me, break my neck

losing time
I'm losing my mind
It's confining me
To inside of me
And making me question
The need to breathe

Because I'm feeling sickly
With each breath it hits me
Another wave of nausea
Please just dismiss me
Tap tap
Collectors are back
But you just left
I wanted to nap

It's four in the morning
I have work soon
Can't get to snoring
I'm too busy signing off on this
I'll go bankrupt
isn't that rich?
Ask the doctor to castrate my emotions
that'll fix me up good
I'll call in the morning

© Jada E. Clark