💥Caution- some may find language offensive but it is reality.

Ever felt so fucking tired of just being?
Shadowed by black clouds I keep seeing.
Days ago I thought I was on my way back,
But my mind entertains thoughts so black.

It's like as though I've lived but now done,
I see it in the sky, but my life has no sun.
I don't feel love, happiness or other emotion,
Everything just going through the motion.

Yes I laughed in last few weeks, for a bit,
But then the mind takes another low hit.
I am so stubborn, want me to win this fight,
Yet inner energy created fails to light.

I don't have dreams or vision beyond far,
All I see and hear is just blah, blah blah.
So do I feel ever so fucking tired of being,
Oh yeah, but is it natural to want to be fleeing?

Lifeless and emptiness is this human shell,
But I continue on each day but it's pure hell.
I have given all I can, now there no more,
Black cloud inside my head, rotten to the core.

Tired of pretending everything is OK and cool,
I'm tired of being, tired of being my mind's fool.
Need to break free but I am at a crossroad,
Do I carry my burden, or be rid of the load?

How did I allow me into this state of mind?
Someone who was strong, caring and kind.
What the hell?, cos I don't want to be here.
Yep, I'm tired of being, tired of life so sincere.

Where's the switch to turn off this black thing?
Let me know so I can return to the living.
Until I find the answer to my fucking mind,
Alternatives remain around, leading me blind.

©EKEllis(2016)