Eyes locked on to one another,
and as brown gazed upon grey,
I saw something,
something I did not possess,
a light that I wanted for myself,
there was no hint of the well of despair that I had seen countless times before,
nor thinly veiled wrath,
or barely stifled pain,
there was a serenity I had never seen before,
eyes that belonged to one who walked peacefully,
there was no storm of emotion for them to navigate,
nor was there the vacant desert that I saw in the eyes of self proclaimed pragmatists and nihilists,
there was simply peace,
an endless field of calm where they walked from place to place,
and for the first time I felt something stir within me,
a jealousy different from that of a scorned lover or a failed victor,
but the jealousy of one who could not find that peace,
I covet those eyes,
to feel the storms and fires within my mind clear and cool,
and to finally stand in the clarity of calm,
the want to not drown in the depths of my depression surrounded by darkness and silent wails,
to not immolate in the fires of my rage and be deafened by the roars of indignance,
it was in those eyes that I saw not only my dream,
but the waking nightmare I am in now,
it is why those eyes are what I covet most
© With clipped wings