I wonder at times,
Why the world can't see me as I?
Why I have to adjust to unjust?
Why to keep relations, I fight ?
I compromise.
Why I have to struggle to keep that someone ,
Who is just being merry nice?
I think , I am just not enough.
Replaceble to be right.
I can't connect to somebodys' soul,
Can't be that somebodys' betterhalf.
I can't vibe, I don't have pace.
I am silly ,Dumb.
Always expecting good for others, damaging myself ,making mistakes, Getting damn hurt.
Can't it just stop for god's sake
Damn i wonder what it is ?
The world , Them , Me , Curse, Soul, Lost?
I lost myself, who was me once I knew.
I stick a fake smile for them being fake nice.
Nobody notices the pain in my numb eyes.
My soul and me no longer knows each other.
My paths and goals are no longer together.
My life and decisions and world is no longer mine altogether.
I lost me , myself , my soul forever.

© Smriti