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Oral Fixation
I’ve got a oral fixation
Dreaming of my cigarette smokes new fascination
I crave the way it sits in between my lips
The pull and push of a smokers breath
Like the waves coming to shore
Cigarettes are my new mornings delight
Lighting one up with no end in sight
Just like my mother
We both throwing a fit for a quick hit
I need one like I need fire
I'm constantly craving warmth
A internal desire
It’s so hot and comforting especially when I’m alone
When I was younger I never knew why my mother smoked
Or why she smoked around me
Now in a way
I understand
It’s addictive and warm
It’s a comfort I can pull out my pocket when I’m feel stressed or overwhelmed
I got this new oral fixation
I like to sit outside when no one’s around
I like to daydream as the smoke swirls in my lungs and out through my nostrils
One time my ex friend said when I smoked I looked like a dragon
I think it’s a fond memory I have of her
She had my mothers face shape
Maybe that’s why I was so attached at the hip to her my freshman year of college
She was warm and inviting
Just like the cigarettes I smoke when I feel like the world is falling on top of me
I know it’s a bad addiction
I know it’s got tar and carcinogenic materials but fuck it, right?
Fuck it!!
I tell myself that every time I light up
FUCK IT
Smoking makes me feel warm inside
That I’ve got a friend on standby
No one can tell me no but myself
And when have I ever told myself no when it comes to being addicted to substances ?
Maybe my obsession mixes with my destructive decisions
Just like my mother
We shared the same breathe once
And now I feel just a lil bit closer to her everytime I light up
When I inhale the poisonous smoke, I think of us on our front porch
Her telling me about the drama of the day or her scolding me about something I did as a small child
It sounds dumb and a lil nostalgic
But who cares
I don’t care
I only care about this oral fixation
I care about the comfort and warmth it gives me
I care about the short lived memories it brings back to me
That’s all the matters
I’m a smoke dragon anyways
Just like my friend said
And so now i smoke cigs
I let the smoke gloss my lungs
I inhale
And think of my mother
And I exhale like a dragon
When no one’s watching
© All Rights Reserved
Dreaming of my cigarette smokes new fascination
I crave the way it sits in between my lips
The pull and push of a smokers breath
Like the waves coming to shore
Cigarettes are my new mornings delight
Lighting one up with no end in sight
Just like my mother
We both throwing a fit for a quick hit
I need one like I need fire
I'm constantly craving warmth
A internal desire
It’s so hot and comforting especially when I’m alone
When I was younger I never knew why my mother smoked
Or why she smoked around me
Now in a way
I understand
It’s addictive and warm
It’s a comfort I can pull out my pocket when I’m feel stressed or overwhelmed
I got this new oral fixation
I like to sit outside when no one’s around
I like to daydream as the smoke swirls in my lungs and out through my nostrils
One time my ex friend said when I smoked I looked like a dragon
I think it’s a fond memory I have of her
She had my mothers face shape
Maybe that’s why I was so attached at the hip to her my freshman year of college
She was warm and inviting
Just like the cigarettes I smoke when I feel like the world is falling on top of me
I know it’s a bad addiction
I know it’s got tar and carcinogenic materials but fuck it, right?
Fuck it!!
I tell myself that every time I light up
FUCK IT
Smoking makes me feel warm inside
That I’ve got a friend on standby
No one can tell me no but myself
And when have I ever told myself no when it comes to being addicted to substances ?
Maybe my obsession mixes with my destructive decisions
Just like my mother
We shared the same breathe once
And now I feel just a lil bit closer to her everytime I light up
When I inhale the poisonous smoke, I think of us on our front porch
Her telling me about the drama of the day or her scolding me about something I did as a small child
It sounds dumb and a lil nostalgic
But who cares
I don’t care
I only care about this oral fixation
I care about the comfort and warmth it gives me
I care about the short lived memories it brings back to me
That’s all the matters
I’m a smoke dragon anyways
Just like my friend said
And so now i smoke cigs
I let the smoke gloss my lungs
I inhale
And think of my mother
And I exhale like a dragon
When no one’s watching
© All Rights Reserved
