After five years...
There's a lot of changes in my life...
I gained weight...
My skin is not dark anymore,
It was totally lightened by the climate
and the environment I’m in right now.
And I thought I'm fine after what happened.
I thought every time I smile, I get over it.
I thought I'm fine after the pain he had caused me.
I thought I’ve already forgotten everything about him.
And everything about us.
I thought I can find someone as easy as that after he left me.
But I was wrong...
When I saw his photo,
My nerve came downright in my breath and stopped for a moment.
My heart felt like being shattered by someone
and my smile turned into tears.
I wanted to convince myself that I don't love him anymore.
I wanted to prove myself that I'm fine,
yes, I'm really fine and everything is going smoothly after he left.
I want to gainsay that I'm not affected with him anymore.
I want to ignore the pain in my heart
That’s slowly killing me.
But... No matter how I convinced myself
that I have already dismissed him from my mind.
But in my heart...
I miss him...
I love him and I always will,
No matter how I disclaim it.

©Mari Felices
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