Why am I lost
Why can’t I just smoke and forget
Why can’t I hide it when it overflows
Why does my head tell I’d be better off gone

It’s a damn shame that my own head
Tells me that I should be dead
I really don’t know
Sometimes it feels true
And those are the nights that I just smoke
til I feel like I’m buried
Drowned it all out with the spark from the flame

Most nights it goes quiet looking through the smoke
But tonight it just got worse and worse
Is it sad that I have to fight myself
All damn night just to breathe
To not take a gun and point it to my head
To pull the trigger
I’d be better off dead

I just don’t get this anymore
What’s the message
What am I supposed to learn
From all of this
I guess life just ain’t easy as we thought as kids

So I smoke my pain away
And I drink the rain away
I rest my mind away in my lovers arms
Why do I always got to be
Chasing a high
I really don’t know
But it’s the only thing that seems to help
© AdendeanG