Thoughts on thoughts on thoughts,
I try to turn them off but they just will not,
All they do is talk and talk and talk,
I try to ignore but they just don't stop,
Like a suspenseful thriller of a killer on the run from the cops,
My mind is the story teller and I'm just the perp waiting to get shot.
So plz pull the trigger on my anxiety that never gives me privacy,
I try to hide but it keeps on finding me,
Idk what's inside of me these voices keep talking and I don't know if it's the truth or if they're lying to me.
Cuz I swear I didn't sign up for this twisted little experiment,
So fire me out of a cannon into oblivion cuz this life full of pollution I'm so used to it's become insidious.
Adapted to living with my head under water I guess I'm amphibious,
But these waters ain't safe I'm not sailing the Caribbean my seas are a little bit different,
Not a spec of innocence exists in this environment I'm living in,
Just vicious maliciousness and a lot of shady serpents slithering.
Always lower than zero below but never am I shivering.
Nor do I quiver I prefer the colder winters,
No ice needed then for all theses liquors I use to drown my liver,
Just Jack Jim, henny and me every night having a family dinner,
Nikki right next to me god damn I bet I'll never quit her,
She helps with the stress but damages my chest I often wish my lips never met hers.
But they did took a hit couldn't quit and that's on me,
I take the credit for that shit fuck having modesty,
Cuz that's what everyone wants to see is honesty,
But honestly I think ppl are more about quantity then quality.
Yeah you got allot of friends but how many of them are supporters,
Got fifty pennies in your hands but me I rather have 2 quarters.
And maybe that's just me trying to divide out my priorities,
Sometimes our trust we choose to keep cuz we're so use to it ending horribly,
Don't know who we should believe plus its created all these insecurities,
A part of my story I let you read then you deceive so why the fuck would I give you more of me.
I learned no one is always gonna be there not even the ones from the get go,
If you was drowning and begging for air they would stare and just let go,
Peope who say they care are never there when you need them the most,
Even after you been there through theirs when it's become to much too bare they go ghost.
M. I. A without a trace when somebody needs somebody the vanish like a cold case.