coming true

next year
I want to celebrate
going on a real date
where this year has only
led to nos - until November
where I met you after a Halloween
snow fall.

I was unsure & skeptical of so many things -
would this grow? is it real?
would I be left as a child on a teeter totter waiting for lift off
with nowhere to go?
and here we are
a month in —

I love you.
you are stable
& willing to hold me
when others have promised
& let me down
with my head still up in the

we are beginning
with a vow of safety
& slow where I’ve known
the rush of goodbye. the
scent of burn in my nose
where you only want to bring
flowers to bloom.

I’m hanging on to
the Christmas waltz
where a new years dream
can replace the deferred hope
I’ve grown accustomed.
© Julia Putzke