I feel my wrists inching,
It's been a while since I saw myself bleeding,
It's like I've given up my medicine
And the illness is worsening,
It's always in my head the pain, the memories.
How can I wash them all away?
Rid myself of the pain?
I hate myself, my body
Get rid of it!

Well I can make the pain go away,
Take a razor
Just a little cut on your wrist,
I know you're trying to stop but the pain won't go away if you do,
I'm not saying end it just bleed a little maybe you'll feel better.

I'm trying to stop!
I promised my mother I won't do so,
I told her I'll talk to her but I know she'll only worry more,
So cutting myself is not an option or taking my life,
Give me a solution so I can lay my head down beause it hurts to think about everything.

Be selfish for once!
If you think about others it won't help you,
Trust me I am your doctor,
Listen to me instead of your heart because it only burdens you with guilt,
It wants you to stay and suffer
But I say to heck with it,
Think about yourself first,
I am your brain, your doctor trust me I'll heal you,
Listen to the heart and you'll always suffer.

I don't know what to choose but the pain is worsening,
I don't want to burden them all with my problems so I keep quiet
And I love them more to hurt them,
So I lay here and take the pain.

#selfharmawareness

© bhengu ss