Supposed to eternally
remain unspoken
I hate
How that silence
is now broken
Honestly
I really hate this poem
I hate life
I hate me
I hate everything I see
in the morning
in the mirror
filled with fear
wondering why Im here
why life is so unlclear
why do I feel worthless
like I have no purpose
I wonder what's beneath the surface
makes me nervous
afraid my demonic side will resurface
maybe that would do me a service
I wouldn't have to be nice anymore
I wanna know where this hate stems from at it's core
I hate that I haven't accomplished anything
is there even anything to the table I bring
the only thing I'm good at is typing
and I never type just how I feel
I don't want to make it a big deal
there are others that have it worse
so I'll say I hate life then hit reverse
and make it seem like it's a joke
laugh while wishing I just wouldn't have spoke
besides laughing works when your life's a joke
I hate how I'm homeless and broke
most the time I look like I just awoke
honestly I wish I had an invisibility cloak
truthfully I wish I would just croak
in my bed
while resting my head
you won't hear me say that again
instead I'll go back to playing pretend
pretend I'm confident
when my insecurities are my one constant
its convenient to act happy
so I'll say
something funny
or catchy hoping the real me you can't see
because if you saw what I saw then you'd stop wasting your time
and
I'd say that's fine
but
it'd be a lie
it's just I've gotten used to it by now
that's why
people getting close to me I can't allow
I know how it turns out
broken hearts
losing friends
a friendship ending can cause the worst kind of broken heart
when it ends
i hate how people liking me is short lived
I mean ever since I was a kid
theyd say I'm smart
then if they'd stick around
it wouldn't be long
before they got annoyed
so real connections I avoid
Since
I'm still hurt
by some of the past ones
I've enjoyed
just for them to leave saying they have had enough
usually
they say being friends with me
was tough
they think that's rough
imagine getting annoyed
not being able to walk away
constantly bombarded
with the annoying things
you hear me say
cuz
I hear them too
all night and all day
but I can't runaway
when the voices are in my own brain
I can't run
there is no escape
not from the voices that annoy me
the ones that scare me
not even
the ones...