I always look back

At my old days.

Not because I ain't happy now,

But to show myself

How much I healed myself alone

To so many extent

From things once I thought

Would end me.



Sometimes I end up crying

Holding on to some thoughts

But now it feels so good.

You know why?

I'm able to balance myself

And I'm proud of me for that.



There were times when

I used to fumble terribly.

But now, when I look back

I'm glad I was like that.

Those never ending melancholic days

Made me who I'm today.



It's not that I'm completely

Brave enough to face anything now,

But I feel like I'm free

Because I learnt to control myself.



Many a times I used to be frightened

Because of my feminity,

Thinking that I'm weak.

But now I proudly owns my femininity

Cause I realised that,

I can very well be the man

I was searching for in every men

Inorder to protect myself.

I can be anything for myself

To keep myself true to myself.



Today when I look back

At my old days,

I tell myself

That I did a great job

Being afraid of my potentials

Because of others

Since now, I'm completely the opposite.



It's not that I'm being pompous

Or flattering or boasting myself,

But, I don't mind if you think like that too.

Its that I'm completely

More of myself now.




© 🐳Praveena🌌✨️