I once dreamt dreams—
Dreams of loving and being loved,
Of finding that one thing that makes the pain and heartache worth it.

I threw myself into my feelings,
Shopped when I couldn’t afford to,
Ate what comforted me,
Drank a bit too much—
Because when I drink, the world isn’t so dreary.
It’s colorful, even.
And in those fleeting moments of indulgence,
I didn’t notice the numbness pressing in,
Didn’t feel the weight in my chest.

For too long, my heart has been still.
Yet I waited.
Waited for love, for fulfillment—
For something that would make it all...