Warmth so low, feeling down
Lights so dim, darkness surround
Thy heavens been thwarted us
'O regrets and guilts plus doubts
What a silent killer for a treatment!
Keeping you awake every night when you're asleep.
Pills won't work then,
Lullabies won't work either...
So cold by dead strokes ahead
Conscience can't cover any warm blankets no matter how thick.
Those experience made us tougher
Sometimes it doesn't
Sad moments tear us apart
Unpredictable as unfortunate
Only thing I wish is to be happy.
To be strong right now, have courage, to have peace of mind
But now, it's not... I'm totally devastated, truly
Isolated from the rest.
So low, so down like a burden child
Complacent because they're just gullible kids
Their deceptive chaste persistent
Poor innocence were taken away
Sarcastic signs of immaturity
By judgemental society.
Hoping for unconditional caress
But no one cares, face it.
Well I, I've been unable to be wiser
Like I'd used to before.
I'm so messed up, complications
Of course is completely blast. Simple things are complicated.
I was wandering from afar
Never looking through the road Unexpected to be tripped
Vines were the barriers
As drinkin' the barrels of vinegar.
I can't help it, can't help myself to burst my tear flowing through
the rivers of the broken.
I want to scream and shout at the canyon, planteau and curves.
Sobbing ... Don't wanna hide my sadness. I just need to
Let these all out.
No need to beers, alcoholic drinks nor black labels.
Drunken junks don't wannabe.
Most weak of the weakest person in the world full of damned.
I knew, and I will recover.
Disappointed, filled with rage so much for anxiety
Lonely and deprived by affection.
Oh! God I'm confused, so chaotic
Underappreciated, Misunderstood
Overthinking the overthought
I'm so unsure by steaming pressure
If I could've make it or not.
Too much suffering from emotional damage
Caused by them, their insults and blasphemous environment
Covetousness and polygamy
What a plastic! What a pests!
What a devil!
Only thing I wish is to be myself again
I knew challenges can be coped
Why can't I?
Maybe I just hanging out with problems
Maybe I'm just so caucious to be unconscious
From the truth which is hurts
Why can't I accept the facts?
It's just it's been a long day
All I knew was I became so pro
Pro at procrastinating
Good at being the bad
Best of being the worst.
Only thing I wish is to move on.
I can't let go from traumatic events of the past that hurts me
Until this day left scars in my skin
The itchiness and pain won't go away, even a painkillers never cure.
Misery and stress occurs every single time
I hope this heal my heart sooner
With your guidance and insightful advice from your solid core
I want a closure in order to move forward
Going through the next chapter
It's just I can leave those pages
From a book that was so phenomenal
Getting over with you I don't know
You're the past, the exciting part
What a cliffhanger twist!
That left me hang.
My life is in someone's control
I'm like a puppet in the strings
Would you help me untie it.
From the wires that pull my navels
Irritated by the syringe
Could you be my friend?
I had a dream, 'twas very high
Without realizing the possibilities of falling flat
It hurts, when you cut by knife
Sharpened and lethal
Please let me! Why won't you let me be me!
Why am I so alone? Do I really deserve this? To became a schlock by you, why are you so jerk?
Only thing I wish is to adapt
By the changes in life lies in believe
Here am I, now reflecting.
Rejected, impaled and irrelevant
Stumbled, lost my way back to home
Abnormal is a new normal.
Singing this melancholy song I feel
Was only a temporary job
Right now I was trying
Tryin' to be okay, tryin' to stay positive
Negative energies too much power
I tried what they supposed to
Learn to live a little like shenanigans as titans
Where as, always sucked at everything
Messing around with time unplugged
Inescapable realities where I,
Even there's many people
Around in my home
But still, when I trudge
I spread warmth and loneliness
Like I never did before
I never recognized myself
Only thing I knew is I can't
Jump over the hedges
I'm afraid to take chances
Risk is all I gotta take
I can't lose my health any longer
To get what you want
Gibberish filter on your face
Must wipe those gushing red
And also the blues.
Of only I could share my perspectives
Trusting you, big deal for me
This madness must stopped
I pray that everything's gonna be alright, I knew this will work.
Have faith and patience self
And you too.
Enough of drama!

@BryanJay at @WritCo
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