Everytime I imagine how I want my life to be it sickens me. Everything I want is right in front of me but I can't get it, I never seem to reach it, they insist everything will fall into place with time but that time never seems to come, it feels so far away but then again maybe that time will never come or maybe that time is just an illusion, a chain that binds my mind within the four walls of hope, thinking something good is coming, where as everything I need or ever want is lurking around waiting for me to realize myself and embrace life as it comes even though it doesn't seem palatable but it could be a lot worse. Who knows?