@arilya_roy
I fail to comprehend what life means as I sit here staring at this blank page;
I hurt myself but I can never cut deep enough for my heart cannot muster up the courage.

I've acquainted hundreds of people but seen two hundred faces for Judas left a legacy not one heart untouched;
My weary self has always been a spectator to my own life watching my hopes and dreams get crushed.

These lonely nights have me sitting by the window envisioning phantasmagoricals of happiness in my loneliness;
If not love then I confess its the darkness that fills my benign souls emptiness.

I wish I could tell you how hard I try to find joy, something with boundaries infinite;
I wish I could go back to the times of innocent desires, resurrect my soul and make things right.

My heart is often reminiscent of when I was a child with a placid heart to the present lucid pleasure of my own blood;
I wish my hearts dying flower could somehow go back to being a gentle blooming bud.

Sixteen now but I yearn to go back to what I was before;
Dive into my heart and you'll be lost in a library full of dreams galore.

I'm isolated in pain, far from everything, slowly dying at a distance;
Cuts impaled on my skin throb
as I die a little everyday in search of acceptance.

I wish I could drown myself in my blood, I wish I could drown myself in my tears;
The thought of death sacred me but my broken heart is an anesthesia to my fears.

I sit in silence as my soul walks up to heavens gates;
I sit in silence as infinity calls and death awaits.
~Aril
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