I’m sorry love
for you will never get to meet the girl
I could’ve been

I could’ve been happy
always a ray of sunshine
always there to help you to be your rock
I could’ve been forgiving
I could’ve been kind when we fight
I could’ve let things go

but unfortunately here we are
I am a product of years of rage
I am a product of years of being belittle
being conformed into someone that obeys
someone that does not talk back
someone that does not talk about how I feel

so my love I am sorry
that this is where we are
I am in an position where I have to learn to grow
where I’m forced to let all this shit go
but no matter how much I try
these old walls
that were built of stone and concrete
are unwilling to fall
especially when I expect this gift at my entrance
to be filled with things that will destroy my city

I’m sorry that I’m not the girl I could’ve been
but am the girl I am
I try
I do
but my love
these walls don’t want to come down


© AllisonKC07