I miss you! I miss your smile, I miss your laugh.
I miss the way you walk the way you talk.
I miss your hugs, I even miss your temper.
Sometimes I swear I see you in a crowd and sometimes when I see a guy from behind and he has the same hair, same shape, same gestures my heart starts to race, then he turns around and it's not you.
And sometimes in the stillness of the night, I swear I can hear your voice calling my name and I can feel you hand wipe away a tear from my cheek.
I know you're not really there. I know you can't come back, but sometimes I feel like if I just try hard enough that I can see you.
If I could go back in time I would tell you not to come home.
I would tell you to go to your Dads, or your uncle Joes.
Anywhere but home.
Nine years and it still hits as much today as it did the day you left me.
What do you say on the anniversary of someone death, because it's certainly not happy.
I still have the lump in my throat that won't go away, my heart heart still feels like it's still in a vice and I can't breathe.
Maybe I shouldn't breathe, maybe I should let the wave take me.
I will never stop loving you.
I miss you, I just miss you.
Love you always. "Mom"!
© Mary Bowie