The older I get
I understand the true meaning of the battle
it used to be with water guns and artillery
Once was excited to meet people
when did it turn into exhaustion?

The older I get
I learned that it isn't a safe circle to stay
which formerly I drew and grew,
happily staying for the bell to ring to come to a place where I do not feel myself presently,
a place now with traumatic remembrances

The Older I get
I realize that they are not the icons
as they describe
this is what I've been taught
to be thankful for,
the more that I give the farther I see and understand the worth of people who admit
The older I get
I can get why I feel a desire for the pain that I do not know whether I can survive, is it because deep down I think I deserve it?
meanwhile, I'm sitting in the dark making a tapestry that arose from blood, anguish, and tears to hide me,
once in love with the spotlight

The older I get
I can see the innocent desperate within me,
The things I long for make me pity myself,
I've been called selfish and stubborn
for protecting the child who does not know how to put down the masks

The Older I get
I discover more new clues to a puzzle that
I already solved
I can see myself surviving the bitterness, wondering where did that strength come from?
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#older #realitywaves #harshReality #survive #theolderIget

© Tinara