It's one way and then another.
It's getting myself into,
and then out of trouble.
Kind of like being in complete darkness ,
without any light,
and
in the same moment
having absolute clarity,
with perfect sight.
It's not being okay,
while being alright.
Going from the highest highs ,
out of plain sight,
Before diving deep down
below, to the darkest depths ,
And lowest lows,
To a place no one else knows,
since
I can only reach it if i go alone .
It's taking extreeme loneliness,
Turning it into friendliness,
emerging back into Society, but still not conforming, or fitting in,
It's idly agreeing, to
what's agreeably disagreeable.
Irrationally pretending something without rational sense, could actually make sense.
It's the finalized decision,
That I don't know what to decide
Its being overly critical,
to the point
of being cynical.
It's usually highly analytical
So it analyzes everything,
normal and practical, outrageous and obscene,
and
anything in between.
It's learning how
to do something
a specific way.
But,
Honestly ,
if I can be straight with you.
It's really
gay.
Talking to much,
with not much to say.
Sometimes it's saying a lot
Without making a sound.
It's losing everything
even yourself,
only to find out,
that's what was needed for your true self to be found.
It's finding out that there's always something worth figuring out.
On good days
it's having trust in myself,
with little to no self doubts.
It's gets distracted, quickly
some think it's sick
it
easily gets
bored.
it's starring at a cereal box with the bowl already poured
it's full of virtrue
but
Patience ,
It lacks.
its patiently
Practicing until it's something that it has.
It's everything I've seen,
all that I know.
Anything I've been given,
all ive taken,
and everything I've earned.
From each of those experiences what I've learned.
An endless list of things I've lost,
What I kept and at what cost.
This place
Is filled
with all my dreams.
As well as it seems,
Too many
Thoughts,
that rush by way too fast.
Plans that never last,
ideas on how things
should change,
things some consider strange.
Attempts
To make reality bend.
Ideas
the normal human brain,
Shouldn't comprehend.
Its
Being able
to tell truthful lies,
By
using honesty
...