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"SET ME FREE".
I never saw it coming but one thing I knew for sure was that I was strong enough to get through it.
So indifferent of you to just assume that I'll be okay.Just because everyone goes through heartbreak,just because you went through it doesn't give you the right to make it far more bearable for me.
You were so special to me, someone I genuinely Loved and cared for, someone I would do anything for.You called it genuine love but I think I was just one of your experiments,a fling,why, because when I was finally confident that I felt you like you felt me it was too late.
They say love conquers all but again love isn't enough.Ypu have the right to fall in love and be attached but when it comes to me,it's a mistake, it's a piss off.When I tell you how I feel I make you uncomfortable,you become distant because all I talk about is my feelings for you.
Last I checked,am a human being with emotions and feelings and free to express them.
It's suffocating how you shut me off everytime.I do one mistake,you push me away saying that am hurting you,but have you ever considered my feelings,the pain I am going through when you make it all about yourself.
I warned you before that am a handful,that I am too much,that most times I'll speak my mind, I'll say things I didn't mean to, things that might hurt you.I have never had to live for somebody else but I tried because you were worth it anyway and trying doesn't mean that I'll get it right everytime,I would fail sometimes and I hoped you would understand and give me the benefit of the doubt.
Sometimes I think whatever you felt for me was just an attachment and not love.Today you are telling me you don't love me anymore,you don't want to get intimate with me again.At first I thought it was because of my inconsistency or that I wanted to date someone else only to realize later on that you had someone else all through.I was never an option,she was.It hurts in ways I can't begin to comprehend.I wished you had waited a day or two to tell me about her but 'where did sympathy go?'you just dumped it all on me as if I was made of iron or something.Do you even care about me?
I was okay with letting my feelings down for me,I was ready to kill them so that I couldn't lose you.I was determined to do anything just so that I could keep you close because honestly I have no one else and I wouldn't want to open and be vulnerable to someone else like I did with you but as always you push me away.
I wonder what would happen if I was carrying your child,if I was pregnant for you.Would you have endured through it all or just left me behind to nurse the child and my disappointment?
You know what,I really thank the Lord because he prevented it from happening,how sad to know that I would have ruined my future for a guy who was to leave me on the sidewalk anyway.
11 days ago after we stopped talking,I was sure that I was going to get through this,that I was strong,that all I needed to do was to first allow myself to feel and accept the sad reality.
I even moved far away from home,I met a guy,I got distracted and realized that I just needed a distraction, someone to take my mind off things,to make me forget about everything but it was all a lie.I had to face reality.
As I sit on the coach today,the thought of you is all I can afford to think about,I feel everything so deeply and I can't help it but cry.It all seems like yesterday,the hurt and the pain still lingers afresh.
I don't hate you, I've tried though but it didn't work.i just don't want to feel like this anymore,this pain,the confusion,the disappointment all of it.I just want to be happy again.I don't want to think about yo,I hate it so much that you are living in my mind rent free.
At times I wonder if you think of me the way I do.If you feel the hurt and the pain but obviously why,when it was so easy for you to give up on me and end things,when you have her by your side...
Why is it so hard for me to let the thought of you go,why does it still hurt so much, why can't I move on and let another love me? You've made it so hard for me to get close to another.You've ruined me and I hate that you have such power over me.
I hate it so much so please,I ask the universe to set me free from this burden,I don't want to neither think about you nor feel everything altogether.I just want to live my life,I want to be my central focus, only me and myself.I just want to be free,so I beg of you,set me free.
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So indifferent of you to just assume that I'll be okay.Just because everyone goes through heartbreak,just because you went through it doesn't give you the right to make it far more bearable for me.
You were so special to me, someone I genuinely Loved and cared for, someone I would do anything for.You called it genuine love but I think I was just one of your experiments,a fling,why, because when I was finally confident that I felt you like you felt me it was too late.
They say love conquers all but again love isn't enough.Ypu have the right to fall in love and be attached but when it comes to me,it's a mistake, it's a piss off.When I tell you how I feel I make you uncomfortable,you become distant because all I talk about is my feelings for you.
Last I checked,am a human being with emotions and feelings and free to express them.
It's suffocating how you shut me off everytime.I do one mistake,you push me away saying that am hurting you,but have you ever considered my feelings,the pain I am going through when you make it all about yourself.
I warned you before that am a handful,that I am too much,that most times I'll speak my mind, I'll say things I didn't mean to, things that might hurt you.I have never had to live for somebody else but I tried because you were worth it anyway and trying doesn't mean that I'll get it right everytime,I would fail sometimes and I hoped you would understand and give me the benefit of the doubt.
Sometimes I think whatever you felt for me was just an attachment and not love.Today you are telling me you don't love me anymore,you don't want to get intimate with me again.At first I thought it was because of my inconsistency or that I wanted to date someone else only to realize later on that you had someone else all through.I was never an option,she was.It hurts in ways I can't begin to comprehend.I wished you had waited a day or two to tell me about her but 'where did sympathy go?'you just dumped it all on me as if I was made of iron or something.Do you even care about me?
I was okay with letting my feelings down for me,I was ready to kill them so that I couldn't lose you.I was determined to do anything just so that I could keep you close because honestly I have no one else and I wouldn't want to open and be vulnerable to someone else like I did with you but as always you push me away.
I wonder what would happen if I was carrying your child,if I was pregnant for you.Would you have endured through it all or just left me behind to nurse the child and my disappointment?
You know what,I really thank the Lord because he prevented it from happening,how sad to know that I would have ruined my future for a guy who was to leave me on the sidewalk anyway.
11 days ago after we stopped talking,I was sure that I was going to get through this,that I was strong,that all I needed to do was to first allow myself to feel and accept the sad reality.
I even moved far away from home,I met a guy,I got distracted and realized that I just needed a distraction, someone to take my mind off things,to make me forget about everything but it was all a lie.I had to face reality.
As I sit on the coach today,the thought of you is all I can afford to think about,I feel everything so deeply and I can't help it but cry.It all seems like yesterday,the hurt and the pain still lingers afresh.
I don't hate you, I've tried though but it didn't work.i just don't want to feel like this anymore,this pain,the confusion,the disappointment all of it.I just want to be happy again.I don't want to think about yo,I hate it so much that you are living in my mind rent free.
At times I wonder if you think of me the way I do.If you feel the hurt and the pain but obviously why,when it was so easy for you to give up on me and end things,when you have her by your side...
Why is it so hard for me to let the thought of you go,why does it still hurt so much, why can't I move on and let another love me? You've made it so hard for me to get close to another.You've ruined me and I hate that you have such power over me.
I hate it so much so please,I ask the universe to set me free from this burden,I don't want to neither think about you nor feel everything altogether.I just want to live my life,I want to be my central focus, only me and myself.I just want to be free,so I beg of you,set me free.
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