Yes,I am a child
A life you brought into this world
You told me I am too much
Too sensitive,too hard to raise
That I need to stop taking up space
Stop having needs of my own
You told me that I am a problem
That I am a bad influence
You asked me to bottle up my emotions
Even today,they await their release in a safe space
Which is anywhere without you
I didn't even realize
That I began to tell myself
All those things I heard you say
The child in me feels suffocated,betrayed
She tries,in vain
Throwing tantrums, falling sick
Hurting herself willingly
Just to gain your attention
Even if for a little time
She still keeps her hopes up
Still craves for your love,adoration
I can't bring myself to break her heart
But I know I need to heal
The adult me knows
That you play with my fears and failures
Know how to push my buttons
No,what doesn't break you doesn't make you stronger
I survived,barely
Trauma broke me
My heart shattering into a million pieces
Can I bring them together again?Not really.

© wallflower

Survivors of trauma survived because they are stronger and braver than the trauma itself,and they chose to live,experience the pain,be the matchstick that burns down but doesn't pass it to the next one.They are the cycle breakers,the ones who end the generational curse.They decided-the cycle ends with them.Proud of people like them,they are a blessing💜🙏

#trauma #mentalhealth #depression #anxiety #nightmare #childhood #abuse #pain #relationships #parents