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Dear Dad
Hi, you know, I would have never thought I'd understand you. To see the pain in lust and existential rush of love you saw in so many of us. Oh how it's wondrous, visually voluptuous with a sound so thunderous it's enveloped in presumptuous and you've seen it in all of us. I never thought I would be looking into space for something so down to earth, deep in dirt laying stiffly in a casket completely inert. If only you were around to teach us things you'd enjoy brought to you by hands that were made to destroy caused by a fraction of your impaction but I can't blame anyone but myself for I am in control of my own actions. I used to believe to be nothing but a dandelion seed, regaled by the eerie poised meadow and the ambient infidelity. Following your shadow was like slipstreaming the wingspan of a butterfly and as I stand above your grave and think back on the many times I congregate the legislature of my stimuli, I condone and accept I am human and a part of you as you are I. I'm old enough to understand your decision, and if I were in your shoes, I might have done some things different but I can't evoke any internal image with external visuals I had never witnessed. Dear Dad, I love you despite your cantankerous repetitions because in those interminable militance were story's I sat through and listened and visioned life as you lived it and the more I think back, my God I was ignorant. What replaced that emptiness was my older brother, though he doesn't know it, he is unlike any other. The hero who I look up to and we shared the same mother and suffered the many possibilities and the different shutters, he still guides my reasons, almost like a father. I can't tell if that is ironic or iconic, I guess I'll leave that to another.

I can wholeheartedly say I HAVE CLAIMED THIS MONSTER to abide by the rules of my holy Father. If only you lived longer to experience that honor. I love you father.


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#family #siblings #lookuptoo