I wanted to cry today
Because I felt like the world was on my shoulder
I miss my parents and my grandmother
And I was worried about my son because I am getting older

I don’t know why, but I just felt sad
And I didn’t know what to do
So, I came home after buying my son dinner
And I took a drink of brandy or two

I am, I am ok, you know
I am not rich or am I poor
I live within my means
And I found all that someone could look for

But still, my heart was squeezing today
And I felt empty like a drum
And I understand why some people when they are going through a tough time
They seek refuge in a bottle of rum

The rum doesn’t help them, no it doesn’t
But the intoxication erased their minds for a bit
Because sometimes life is just too overwhelming
And especially when you don’t know how to deal with it

, so, I took some brandy tonight
Because I felt lost and alone
And I had to be the rock and mountain for my family
But inside I was melting like an ice cone

My mother just passed away
And I let her down
It took me years to go and see her
And when I did, she didn’t know that I was around

And when I had to leave her to come to the USA
She was holding my hand and I had to let her hand go
And it bothered me so much
That as soon as I got back to the USA. I book a ticket to return asap to Trinidad and Tobago

But before I could have gone back to see her
I got the news that my mother had died
And just sat there numb and deserted
And I shed many tears for my mother but I didn’t let my son see me when I cried

Because I have to be strong for him
I couldn't let him see me broken down
Because he can’t be strong for himself
So, he needs me to always be around

You, know some will claim to be good to their parents
And claim to be a good son or daughter
But in all due honesty, that title is not for us to claim
Our sacrifices can’t be self-claimed, they had to be bestowed on us by others

I felt like I wasn’t a good son to my mother and father
I mean, I made give them the best when they come to New York and it was a joy to have them there
Because I always try to do my best to make them happy, but when they were very sick,
And needed me, I wasn’t there

But thank God that they won’t alone
And they had other children that were there morning, noon, and night
and thought it was hard to see their parents like that
they did all that they could’ve done to make everything seems alright

And I felt guilty for now being there for my father
And now feel guilty for now being there for my mother too
But my parents know how much we love them
And they always said to us,’ if anything happens to us, we want our children to be happy and celebrated our life, and being sad is something that they didn’t want us to do

So, we will live our life’s like if our parents are always there
And we won’t let the sadness we feels get it the way
But as we continued to live as our parents wants us too
We will always feel sad and miss our parents every single day
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