I'm sitting in the back seat riding around with some old friends of mine.
I get bored, and of course it's that time.
I start to think, I find myself deep in my thoughts.
I swear my mind is a racing clock.
It's times like this I start to cry.
My mind runs faster than my processing time.
My anxiety level starts to rise.
I can feel it coming.
I can't start running, it's to late.
And now it's time...
A panick attack hits me.
Oh no, I can't breathe
Here I am, crying hysterically.
Hyperventilating, acting so crazy.
Sarcastically laughing, but nothing is funny.
I'm confused, my mind is running.
I'm crying so hard, I just don't want people to see.
Trying to hide this episode so nobody thinks weird of me.
It's so hard having anxiety.
Don't ask what's wrong.
I can't say..
My racing thoughts get in the way.
I swear it's impossible for me to be free.
My own damn mind suffocates me.
Im tired, I'm sore, it's been so long.
I hate when my mind makes me fall.
Anger and sadness is all that's there.
When can my happiness come to the fair?
I think it's time now, please be there.
I'm mentally Ill, I see it like that.
I'm sure I'm not the only one going through crap.
I know I got issues, I might need some tissues.
Listen to me while I tell you my issues.
ADHD, Bipolar, Depression and Anxiety.
Those are my issues, now you see.
Popping pills since the first grade.
So young, I could barely read.
I had no say at the time.
That isn't right, I couldn't put up a fight
Docs say they help stabilize my mind.
I can't lie, they do make me fine.
I hate taking pills.
I don't have time.
I wanna live my life without pills, perfectly fine.
Im 25 now, my whole life is on the line.
I feel like a pill head even though the drugs are mine.
So many pills just to be fine.
I don't want this life to be mine.
I want to live my life perfectly fine.
© Tsmallz