hello I miss you one day I think it's true the next I see right through one day I think it's true and the next I see right through
I don't want to be irrational believe me I need to be very rational
but when I stepped up those stairs and walked into where you had last been there was something not right the energy was not surrounding me one day I think that it's true the next I see right through or at least I think I do could it be the stage of denial or could I be leaning more towards the truth I feel like I'll never know either way but the time that we spent together was much appreciated much needed and much missed and though you're not here you will live on you meant well you'll never really treated very well but I guess that's how it goes I will often wonder if you have found peace because I find it hard to cope in this life as there is no peace there is only demand there is so much stress my life is super controlled by people who won't admit it they won't admit that that they've been trying to coerce my path that some of their attempts have worked they expect me to believe that every single thing that I catch is a coincidence and that there's no relevance to anything that I'm saying that is truly affecting me and they say so with a smile and when they do that I suffer and they see me suffer but they do not step back they continue so I often wonder if you found peace because peace is something I lack because there is lack thereof peace and now that you're gone there is lack thereof support next to none because no one in this world could care to save their lives
and a lot of people just refuse to be there and then it gets to the point where I don't care but I've always cared about you and if I could have been there be aware that I would have been there but I always caught up in my misery trying to think through why things happen the way they do trying to ask why my voice don't matter and as the car passed by your house I felt the urge to visit but the car drove a tad bit faster than I spoke and then 20 hours later is when I hear no news I ever wanted to hear it's just a big pile of pain this world some days I think it's true some days I see right through if I do see right through it brings me peace because maybe you'll finally be treated right and not be played the fool as they do too many plus me