They put me in the position of hating myself, making me believe that I was worthless and unworthy of love. It's as if there is a scale or level to how much goodness you are supposed to have to be considered good enough. Their suspicions linger, resembling the eyes of a killer, eagerly anticipating my failure to bring their plans to life. I am treated as a convenient scapegoat, responsible for everything just by being in their presence. It feels like a fabricated story where ulterior motives are assumed, and genuine intentions are doubted, leading to doubts about me as well.


Everyone expects me to demonstrate goodness and good intentions, but any defense or disagreement suddenly paints me as the awful one. It feels like a constant attack, with people viewing themselves as victims and projecting me as the abuser. I have been made a convenient target for blame, perceived as a threat in some way. Simply by glancing at me, they believe everything can be blamed on me, leading to a lack of support and the feeling of being unable to accomplish anything.


Criticism is a constant presence in my life,...