When your memory burns red in my mind
I wonder still if you ever find
Yourself reflecting on those long-forgotten summers
The ones we danced away when we were a decade younger
When your cares were free
And I lived in the way of spontaneity

I met you the summer my world started to expand
From the hopeless casuality of his dirty hands
To that of a woman who had her own plan
Twenty was sweet
But perhaps what was peculiar to me
Was the sound of your laugh
Like you'd never experienced anything remotely bad
Though I know enough now to contradict that

Time passed
That damn summer sun set in the west
Below that majestic mountain as we watched from your place
It was dawn by the time I found myself silently begging you with heartbroken eyes
For a permanent sliver of space tattooed to your side
But you're not the tattoo type
And I'm not the settling down kind

Friday the thirteenth, it was a bitter-cold January
My world imploded, along with every ounce of my fragile sanity
But there you were -
Unselfish and sympathetic and forever kind
As I blacked out from the pain of losing him, and never saying goodbye

To him, first
Then you, too

And I know our hourglass has capsized
Sand is leaking from its sides
But still sometimes I see a golden tint to your shadow in my mind
And I cry

Because I don't know anymore if my glasses are rose-tinted
You never said you loved me back

But you can't turn back time,
and I'll never learn why.



© krystlereisler