I feel a strangeness,
A shifting of colors,
A repurposement.

Sometimes seeing others' struggles
makes your own seem so slight.

It has been a week since my last relapse.
I never had the willpower to fight just for me.

But when you're trying to stay strong
for someone else,
things change.

In holding myself back,
I find my energy and conviction swelling,
dull colors resurfacing from the hole in my soul;
Thus giving rise to a desire to pour into others,
since I...